Sex and Psychology Podcast

Bestselling author Lisa Taddeo has put women’s stories front and center in all of her books. Her work explores how women navigate sexual desire, sexual trauma, and sexual double standards–and it is utterly fascinating and captivating. For today’s episode, I sat down with Lisa to talk about these prominent themes in her writings and what they tell us about women’s sexuality. Lisa’s first nonfiction book, Three Women, was an instant #1 New York Times bestseller and is currently in production as a series at Showtime with Shailene Woodley set to star. This book takes a deep dive into the sex lives and relationships of three American women who live in different parts of the country. Following Three Women, Lisa published her debut fiction novel Animal, which tells the story of Joan, a woman who has endured a lifetime of cruelty from men—and eventually forges the power to strike back. Lisa’s latest book, Ghost Lover, is a collection of short stories that feature a series of women who are searching for—and frequently struggling to find—fulfillment in their lives. We discuss all three of Lisa’s books, including where she drew her inspiration, the major themes (including why sex and death run through all of them), and some of the sexist criticism her work has evoked. To learn more about Lisa, visit lisataddeo.com and follow her on Instagram @lisadtaddeo Thanks to Promescent (promescent.com) and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes (modernsextherapyinstitutes.com) for being sponsors of this episode! This podcast was made on Zencastr. Join Zencastr today and receive 40% off of their professional plan for 3 months with my exclusive discount code: sexandpsych *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Chris Sowa (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Why are we attracted to some people, but not to others? The answer to this question is surprisingly complex, but research has uncovered a set of scientifically-backed principles that can pretty reliably facilitate sexual and romantic attraction. This episode will help you to better understand those “laws” of attraction, including how you can leverage them to enhance your own appeal to others. Sexuality educator Ashley Weller returns for this show. Ashley is a professor at Chapman University who runs a podcast called What’s your Position? that tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Some of the topics we explore include: Is attraction something that is usually instantaneous, or does it tend to grow over time? We often hear that “birds of a feather flock together.” But we also hear that “opposites attract.” So which one is true? Are we attracted to similarity or differences? What’s the best way to start a conversation with someone you’re attracted to? Do pick-up lines actually work? Can playing hard to get make you appear more desirable? How similar or different are men and women when it comes to what they want in a partner? If you find yourself attracted to the “wrong” type of person, how do you break that pattern? To learn more about Ashley, check out her podcast What’s your Position? and follow her on Instagram @whatsyourpositionpodcast Thanks to the Kinsey Institute (kinseyinstitute.org) for sponsoring this episode! The Kinsey Institute’s (kinseyinstitute.org) 75th anniversary is underway and you are invited to join in the celebration! Follow @kinseyinstitute on social media to learn more about upcoming events. Also, please consider a gift or donation to the Institute to support sex research and education. Click here to donate. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Chris Sowa (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.  

In the classic film When Harry Met Sally, Meg Ryan famously said, “Most women at one time or another have faked it.” And she was right. But it turns out that women aren’t the only ones who do this. Fake orgasms are surprisingly common across genders. So why do so many people feign the peak of pleasure? And is pretending to climax a good thing or a bad thing? That’s why we’re going to be talking about today. I am joined by Ashley Weller, a professor at Chapman University in Southern California who teaches human sexuality courses. Ashley has more than 15 years of experience in sex education and runs a podcast called What’s your Position? that tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Some of the topics we explore in this show include: How many people have ever faked an orgasm before? Why do people fake orgasms, and do men’s and women’s reasons for doing it differ? What do people actually do when they pretend to climax? Is it always a bad idea to fake orgasms? What should you do if you’re been faking it but don’t want to do that anymore? What should you do if you suspect your partner of faking orgasms? To learn more about Ashley, check out her podcast What’s your Position? and follow her on Instagram @whatsyourpositionpodcast Thanks to Promescent (promescent.com) and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes (modernsextherapyinstitutes.com) for being sponsors of this episode! This podcast was made on Zencastr. Join Zencastr today and receive 40% off of their professional plan for 3 months with my exclusive discount code: sexandpsych *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Chris Sowa (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Human beings spend about one-third of their lives asleep. We do this because sleep is an essential body function. When we don’t get enough sleep, we suffer in a lot of ways–and that includes our sex lives. That’s why today’s episode is all about the important connection between sex and sleep. As you’ll learn, getting better sleep is one of the keys to having better sex. But it’s also the case that having a great sex life can help you get better sleep. The connection between sleep and sex goes both ways! I am joined by Dr. Michele Lastella, a senior lecturer at Central Queensland University and a global leader in sleep research in athletes. He has 70 peer-reviewed publications related to sleep, sport psychology, psychological well-being and more. Some of the topics we address in this episode include: Why do we often feel tired or sleepy after sex? How does sex impact the quality of the sleep we get? Does masturbation affect sleep in the same way? Does the impact of sex on sleep depend on whether or not orgasm occurs? Does sex affect sleep in the same way for men and women? How do both temporary and chronic sleep disruptions (such as sleep apnea and insomnia) affect our sexual health and well-being? Why do penile and clitoral erections occur during sleep? What are some practical tips for getting better sleep so that you can have better sex? Check it out! To learn more about Michele, check out his Google Scholar profile and follow him on Twitter @sleeppsyc Thanks to the Kinsey Institute (kinseyinstitute.org) for sponsoring this episode! The Kinsey Institute’s (kinseyinstitute.org) 75th anniversary is underway and you are invited to join in the celebration! Follow @kinseyinstitute on social media to learn more about upcoming events. Also, please consider a gift or donation to the Institute to support sex research and education. Click here to donate. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: LEGIT Audio (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

It is hard to believe, but we have reached episode 100 of this podcast! So how do you celebrate 100 episodes of a sex show? I’ve put together a compilation featuring some of the most fascinating and mind-blowing facts about sex we’ve covered so far. Specifically, we’re going to revisit my interviews with Hallie Lieberman (Episode 21), Dr. Ina Park (Episode 39), Dr. Lisa Dawn Hamilton (Episode 53) and Dr. Nicole Prause (Episode 60). Some of the things we cover in this episode include: Why butt plugs used to be marketed as a cure for asthma (no joke!). Whether sexually transmitted infections can hijack our brains and change our sexual behavior in order to make them more infectious. How a study of a cow’s clitoris became the basis for what we think we know about the human clitoris. Why some people get sick every time they orgasm. Thank you for supporting the show! If you listen on Apple Podcasts, please consider a paid subscription to Sex and Psychology Premium to help keep the show going and to receive new episodes ad-free. Cheers to the next 100 episodes! Thanks to Promescent (promescent.com) and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes (modernsextherapyinstitutes.com) for being sponsors of this episode! This podcast was made on Zencastr. Join Zencastr today and receive 40% off of their professional plan for 3 months with my exclusive discount code: sexandpsych *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Chris Sowa (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Join Dr. David Frederick, an Associate Professor of Health Psychology at Chapman University, as he dives into the intriguing dynamics of dating and payment. He explores who typically foots the bill on first dates, revealing the impact of traditional roles compared to modern expectations. David discusses how willing women are to pay, men's feelings about this, and what these financial exchanges imply about dating and sexual norms. Expect insights into cultural origins of payment expectations and tips for navigating the tricky financial waters of dating.

The impact of religion on our sex lives is complex—it is neither uniformly negative nor positive. The way that religion affects sexuality really depends upon how sexuality is situated within a given religion. But when religiosity and sexuality conflict, how do you navigate this? That’s what we’re going to be talking about today. How do sex therapists balance religious and sexual identity in the therapeutic process when conflicts arise? Is it possible to resolve this in a way that doesn’t require sacrificing one or the other? Dr. Eric Sprankle returns for this episode (he was a previous guest on Episode 96: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation). Eric is an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and the co-director of the Sexuality Studies program at Minnesota State University, Mankato. He is also a licensed clinical psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist. Some of the topics we explore in this show include: How often do people seek sex therapy for issues relating to religiosity, and what kinds of issues are they usually experiencing? How do you balance religious identity and sexual identity (or desire) in the process of sex therapy? How can we make sex education something that is more inclusive of religious diversity? In what ways can religiosity have a positive impact on sexuality? If you’re struggling with issues of religiosity and sexuality, how can you find a therapist who is affirming of both? Check it out! To learn more about Eric, visit his website at drsprankle.com and follow him on Twitter or Instagram @DrSprankle Thanks to the Kinsey Institute (kinseyinstitute.org) for sponsoring this episode! The Kinsey Institute’s (kinseyinstitute.org) 75th anniversary is underway and you are invited to join in the celebration! Follow @kinseyinstitute on social media to learn more about upcoming events. Also, please consider a gift or donation to the Institute to support sex research and education. Click here to donate. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Jonathan Raz (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

When you’re feeling that intense passion in the early stages of a relationship, having great sex is usually pretty easy. However, those feelings don’t tend to stick around very long. It’s normal for passion to begin fading after a year or two. But it doesn’t have to disappear entirely. It’s very much possible to get the spark back–and keep it going–with a little bit of effort. So let’s talk about how to do it! For today’s episode, I am joined by Dr. David Frederick, an Associate professor of Health Psychology at Chapman University in Southern California. Dr. Frederick has taught more than 70 courses on human sexuality and gender. Some of the questions we explore include: What typically happens to sexual frequency and satisfaction over time in long-term relationships? Why is trying new sexual activities crucial to boosting passion? And what kinds of novel activities have the biggest impact? How many new things do you need to try sexually in order to experience a boost in passion? Are the factors that predict sexual satisfaction the same for lesbians and heterosexual women? What about for gay versus heterosexual men? What can lesbians teach heterosexual women about closing the “orgasm gap?” Besides trying new sexual activities, what are some other tried and true ways of reinvigorating passion in a long-term relationship? To learn more about David, check out his website here and visit his Google Scholar page here for more information on his research. Thanks to Promescent (promescent.com) and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes (modernsextherapyinstitutes.com) for being sponsors of this episode! This podcast was made on Zencastr. Join Zencastr today and receive 40% off of their professional plan for 3 months with my exclusive discount code: sexandpsych *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: LEGIT Audio (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Masturbation is something that most people do, but many of us have a complicated relationship with it. For example, some people are under the impression that masturbation is an unhealthy or even “addictive” activity. Given that we’re in the midst of Masturbation Month, now seems like the perfect time to set the record straight on solo sex and tell you what you really need to know about it. My guest today is Dr. Eric Sprankle, an Associate Professor of Clinical Psychology and the co-director of the Sexuality Studies program at Minnesota State University, Mankato. He is also a licensed clinical psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist, and author of the forthcoming book, DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: How long have human beings been masturbating? What makes masturbation in humans unique compared to other species that do it? Where did this idea that masturbation is unhealthy come from? What kinds of masturbation “cures” were used in the past to discourage this behavior? (This is some weird and wacky stuff!) Is there any truth to the idea that masturbatory abstinence can improve your health or boost testosterone? Is masturbation really an “addictive” behavior? Can women really become “addicted” to their vibrators? How can we develop a healthier relationship with solo sex? Check it out! To learn more about Eric, visit his website at drsprankle.com and follow him on Twitter or Instagram @DrSprankle Thanks to Promescent (promescent.com) and the Modern Sex Therapy Institutes (modernsextherapyinstitutes.com) for being sponsors of this episode! This podcast was made on Zencastr. Join Zencastr today and receive 40% off of their professional plan for 3 months with my exclusive discount code: sexandpsych *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Jonathan Raz (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Have you ever fantasized about being ‘forced’ to have sex? If so, you’re not alone. Fantasies about being taken against one’s will (also known as ‘ravishment fantasies’ and ‘consensual non-consent fantasies’) are actually quite common. But just how many people report having had them? And why? That’s what we’re going to be exploring in today’s episode. I’ll be sharing five examples of forced sex fantasies that have emerged in my research to illustrate what these fantasies tend to look like, and also to explore the psychology behind them.  To help me put this show together, Rose Caraway returns to narrate the actual fantasies. Rose is a writer, editor, and publisher who runs the Kiss Me Quick’s Erotica Podcast. She also served as the narrator for Dr. David Ley’s amazing book, Insatiable Wives, which was the subject of Episode 70 of this program. The fantasies we dive into in this show come from my book Tell Me What You Want, and they include: Ravished By My Lover Kidnapped and Forced to Have Sex Animalistic Sex With an Alpha Male Banged By the Bachelorettes Taken By a Warrior Princess I walk you through the main themes behind each of these fantasies and the common threads that unite them, while also considering similarities and differences in how these fantasy scenarios play out for men and women. I also discuss who is most likely to have fantasies of this nature and why. This is a fascinating episode. Be sure to check it out! Thanks to The Handy (thehandy.com) and the Kinsey Institute (kinseyinstitute.org) for being sponsors of this episode! The Handy, made by Sweet Tech, is an automatic stroker designed for self-pleasure. Pair it with your sleeve of choice to mimic realistic sensations of different partnered activities with precise speed and stroke control. Visit https://link.thehandy.com/sexandpsych-1 to learn more and use my exclusive discount code (sexandpsych) to get 10% off your order. The Kinsey Institute’s (kinseyinstitute.org) 75th anniversary is underway and you are invited to join in the celebration! Follow @kinseyinstitute on social media to learn more about upcoming events. Also, please consider a gift or donation to the Institute to support sex research and education. Click here to donate. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Jonathan Raz (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.