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Beautiful Stories From Anonymous People

Latest episodes

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Jun 3, 2025 • 1h 26min

Thirteen Secret Second Cousins

A new master’s degree, a recent family death, and...13 secret second cousins? This week’s caller is processing a wild year of grief, discovery, and chaotic family history, including one grandma-sized scandal and a mom who always kept things interesting. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Head to wellnesstogether.org/allhandsondeck to learn more about the people and places meeting mental health needs in creative, community-rooted ways, building connection, care, and lasting change. For the dad who deserves better than basic—Quince has you covered. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/ BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout.  Feel the difference an extraordinary night’s sleep can make with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets, at BollAndBranch.com/beautiful Get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus get FREE shipping. Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details.  
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May 27, 2025 • 1h 25min

Left an Open Marriage

A strict religious upbringing, an older husband, and an open marriage she never expected. This week’s caller talks with Gethard about how she got there and how she’s finally building a life that actually feels like hers. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Head to wellnesstogether.org/allhandsondeck to learn more about the people and places meeting mental health needs in creative, community-rooted ways, building connection, care, and lasting change. For the dad who deserves better than basic—Quince has you covered. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Give the “dads” in your life a unique, heartfelt gift you’ll all cherish for years—Storyworth! Right now, save $10 during their Father’s Day sale when you go to Storyworth.com/beautiful Warby Parker has over 270 locations to help you find your next pair of glasses. You can also head over to WarbyParker.com/BEAUTIFUL right now to try on any pair virtually! 
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May 20, 2025 • 1h 28min

Middle of Nowhere

Like some of the show’s earliest episodes, this one’s unpredictable from the jump. Sometimes funny. Sometimes uncomfortable. Our caller shares a winding history of reckless choices, addiction, and moments from his past that don’t sit easy, even for him. Set against a backdrop of small-town life and wide-open fields, it’s a story where the line between shenanigans and serious mistakes blurs fast. No clear takeaway. Just a lot to sit with. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre, including the upcoming 24 hour fundraising show!  Head to wellnesstogether.org/allhandsondeck to learn more about the people and places meeting mental health needs in creative, community-rooted ways, building connection, care, and lasting change Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000 to get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply.  Upgrade your wardrobe. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/ BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. 
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May 13, 2025 • 1h 34min

Perky 911 Dispatcher

A 911 dispatcher calls in to walk Gethard through the ins and outs of emergency dispatch. From how calls get prioritized, to the systems that keep everything moving, there’s a lot more happening behind the scenes than people realize. It’s a fascinating look at a job most of us only think about in a crisis. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad-free episodes and access to exclusive audio, including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to wellnesstogether.org/allhandsondeck to learn more about the people and places meeting mental health needs in creative, community-rooted ways, building connection, care, and lasting change Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Headspace FREE for 60 days. Go to Headspace.com/BEAUTIFUL Start your initial free online visit today at forhers.com/BEAUTIFUL for your personalized hair loss treatment options. Elevate your closet with Quince. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.   
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May 6, 2025 • 1h 34min

First Day As a U.S. Citizen

This week’s caller became a U.S. citizen hours before the call, so naturally, she gives Gethard an impromptu citizenship test. They cover life as a Canadian transplant in the South, share their love for ‘80s wrestling, and reflect on what it really means to be an American. She also hints at a near-kidnapping story, but you’ll have to head to beautifulanonymous.com to hear that. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad-free episodes and access to exclusive audio, including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller. Head to wellnesstogether.org/allhandsondeck to learn more about the people and places meeting mental health needs in creative, community-rooted ways, building connection, care, and lasting change. Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Get 15% off, plus free shipping on your first set of sheets, at BollAndBranch.com/beautiful Visit Upwork.com to post your job for free and connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. For a limited time, get Headspace FREE for 60 days. Go to Headspace.com/BEAUTIFUL Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/ BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus get FREE shipping. Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details.
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Apr 29, 2025 • 1h 24min

SEX GOD

From Neptune to everywhere and back again. Our caller is in love, looking for joy, and figuring it out along the way. This one’s silly, heartfelt, and a little all over the place, just the way we like it.  Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Get fifteen percent of your first purchase at FastGrowingTrees.com using the code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/ BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Shop Mother’s Day at Quince. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Warby Parker has over 270 locations to help you find your next pair of glasses. You can also head over to WarbyParker.com/BEAUTIFUL right now to try on any pair virtually!
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Apr 22, 2025 • 1h 17min

Parade Girl Gets Parade Girled

Gethard is finally taking a well-earned, long-overdue vacation. But we’re not leaving you hanging. Instead, we brought in a past caller/frenemy of the show who knows exactly what makes a great Beautiful/Anonymous call. If you’ve been around for a while, you know Parade Girl as the caller who somehow cracked our phone system and sparked a whole saga. This week, she ends up chatting with a caller who shares her and Gethard’s birthday and who gives her a taste of her own medicine. Geth’ll be back next week. In the meantime, enjoy this weird little break from our regularly scheduled programming. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Start your initial free online visit today at forhers.com slash BEAUTIFUL Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000 to get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply. Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/beautiful!
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Apr 15, 2025 • 1h 23min

Hockey-obsessed Military Mental Health Worker

On the way to a hockey game where they're being honored for their non-profit work, this week’s caller explains the tension it’s caused with their day job in military behavioral health. They talk with Gethard about finding purpose, joy, and free tickets to cool stuff. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Get fifteen percent of your first purchase at FastGrowingTrees.com using the code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Visit Upwork.com right now to post your job for free and connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000 to get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply. For your next trip, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from Quince. Go to Quince.com/beautiful for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order.
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Apr 8, 2025 • 1h 20min

Running for Congress (Let's F***ing Go)

She might not have a background in politics, but this caller is thinking about running for office. She and Gethard talk about what it means to feel called to lead, why the current political climate pushed her to consider a campaign, and how terrifying–and thrilling–it is to start from scratch. This one might just light a fire under you, no matter what you believe in. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Get fifteen percent of your first purchase at FastGrowingTrees.com using the code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/BEAUTIFUL and use promo code BEAUTIFUL at checkout. Text BEAUTIFUL to 64000 to get twenty percent off all IQBAR products, plus FREE shipping. Message and data rates may apply.  
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Apr 1, 2025 • 1h 23min

The Death Thing Is a Bonus

A death doula in training talks with Gethard about being a newbie in her field, why she thinks death should be joyful, and how planning your funeral might be the kindest thing you can do for your loved ones. Sign up for Beautiful/Anonymous+ to get ad free episodes and access to exclusive audio including 5 Random Questions with this week’s caller.  Follow Beautiful/Anonymous on our new TikTok: @beautiful.anonymous Head to punchup.live/chrisgethard for tickets to That Show hosted by Gethard at UCB Theatre. Leave us a voicemail at (973) 306-4676 Upgrade your sleep during Boll & Branch’s Annual Spring Event! For a limited time get 20% off at BollAndBranch.com/beautiful Go to Headspace.com/BEAUTIFUL to unlock all of Headspace FREE for 60 days

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