The insight from this snip is that balance in relationships is not about the amount of time spent together, but rather about how a person shows up and engages when they are present. Families interviewed about balance expressed that they don't want their loved ones to come home and take out their frustrations on them or see them as an inconvenience. Instead, they desire connection and engagement. The focus should be on being present and actively participating in activities with loved ones, rather than just being physically present. Quality interactions and being engaged in the moment are more important than the quantity of time spent together.
Throughout each day, all of us make little shifts in our roles and responsibilities; we take off one hat and put on another. Sometimes these shifts are physical, as when we commute from home to the office. Other times, the shifts are mental, as when we finish working on an administrative task and start working on a creative one.
My guest calls these little shifts “microtransitions” and says that mastering them is a significant key in living a happy, fulfilled, and successful life. His name is Dr. Adam Fraser and he’s a peak performance researcher and the author of The Third Space. As Adam explains, in each microtransition, there are three spaces: the first space which is the task, role, or place you’re leaving behind, the second space, which is the task, role, or place you’re transitioning to, and the third space which is the in-between transition itself. To make an ideal microtransition, you break that third space into three phases, and Adam walks us through how to execute each one so you can show up as your best self in the second space. We talk about how to make microtransitions between different work roles, and spend a lot of our conversation on how to improve the microtransiton between work and home — even if you work from home — so you can arrive ready to engage with your partner or family.
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