We’ve all got parts of our personality or our past that we’re ashamed of. We might refer to these parts of ourselves as our demons, our baggage, or our secrets; no one is immune.So, how do you want to deal with this situation? Stay coiled in shame and denial? That only makes the demons stronger. An alternative, per my guest Koshin Paley Ellison, is to approach your stuff with “healthy embarrassment.” That allows you to work more skillfully with your baggage so that it doesn’t own you. And once you’re cooler with yourself, that can improve your relationships with other people, which is probably the most important variable for your happiness. And healthy embarrassment is just one of many extremely useful things we are going to talk about today.Koshin Paley Ellison is an author, Zen teacher, Jungian psychotherapist, and Certified Chaplaincy Educator. He is the co-founder of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care, an amazing place which, among other things, trains people to be volunteers in hospice centers. Koshin is the author of a new book called Untangled: Walking the Eightfold Path to Clarity, Courage, and Compassion, which centers on a classic Buddhist list called The Eightfold Path, the Buddha’s recipe for enlightenment or, as Koshin puts it, “the most awesome combo platter.”In this episode we talk about:What is The Eightfold Path and how it fits into another Buddhist list, The Four Noble TruthsHow to use the list to do life betterThe danger of perfectionism in putting the list to use in your lifeHow to bridge the gap between what we say we care about and what we’re actually doing with our livesHow sitting with your pain can lead to freedomThe utility and pitfalls of gossipHow we can look at the idea of “killing” in many different ways, including how one can “kill a moment” or “the energy in a room”How the concept of “right effort” can help us find the balance between not doing enough and overworking ourselvesHow being uncomfortable is a sign of real engagement with our practiceAnd Koshin’s addition of the concept of “mystery” as another aspect of the eightfold pathFull Shownotes: www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/koshin-paley-ellison-528See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sensei Koshin Paley Ellison, a Zen teacher and psychotherapist, discusses Buddhism's teachings on loneliness, love, and human connection. They explore how the feeling of separateness is an illusion created by our minds and how breaking down that illusion can lead to connection. They also discuss the importance of freeing ourselves from trauma, cultivating deep friendships, recognizing opportunities and energy drains, shaping our view of the world, and focusing on positive thoughts.

In This Episode, You'll Learn How to investigate suffering and learn how to work with it in a fresh way Why we need to explore the impact of greed, shame, and other "giants" in our daily lives Understanding the power of apology and how it can help us move away from shame and toward freedom How to start bring our actions in alignment with our values to guide your spiritual path Learning to how to acknowledge your trauma and also take responsibility for healing To Learn More, click here  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.