A Pastor and a Philosopher Walk into a Bar

Miroslav Volf: How Striving to Be Better Than Others Makes Us Worse

Nov 14, 2025

In this engaging discussion, theologian Miroslav Volf, author of The Cost of Ambition, explores how the desire to surpass others can undermine our well-being. He distinguishes healthy aspiration from harmful superiority, emphasizing agape—unconditional love—as the foundation for true excellence. Volf discusses how Christ's humility, as expressed in Philippians 2, challenges competitiveness. He warns that obsession with comparison devalues our unique gifts and calls for a return to mere humanity, urging love and honor for all beyond mere achievement.

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ANECDOTE

Staircase Moment Reveals Everyday Pride

Miroslav Volf recounts feeling superior climbing stairs while others used escalators at Chicago airport.
He uses this small moment to show how everyday comparisons fuel a superiority habit that harms mental health.

INSIGHT

Striving Versus Superiority

Volf distinguishes healthy striving from ambition to be superior, which he criticizes.
He argues that indexing self-worth to comparative performance is avoidable and corrosive.

ADVICE

Prioritize Truth Over Rhetorical Wins

In dialectic or academic contexts, pursue truth rather than rhetorical wins.
Volf advises making commitment to truth the organizing value, not outscoring opponents.

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Is the drive to be better than others making us worse? We talk with theologian Miroslav Volf about his book The Cost of Ambition and explore why comparison-based striving saturates our schools, churches, workplaces, and politics. Volf separates healthy aspiration from superiority-seeking and makes a compelling case for excellence without domination, rooted in agape, i.e., unconditional love that affirms people beyond performance.

We dig into the Christ hymn of Philippians 2 and why self-emptying is not weakness but a different kind of strength. Volf shows how resurrection and ascension empower humility rather than feed triumphalism and why honoring everyone is both a spiritual discipline and a democratic necessity. From the academy’s “one-up” culture to the marketplace’s imitation traps, he argues that obsessing over competitors blinds us to our unique gifts and corrodes joy. Even stalwart capitalists like Warren Buffett warn against competitor-fixation. Volf adds a deeper moral and theological critique as well, drawing on Paul’s piercing question: What do you have that you did not receive?

We also test his claims against Nietzsche’s will to power, happiness research on social comparison, and the rise of Christian nationalism. Is Christ a moral stranger to our priorities? Volf challenges both sides of the aisle to recover mere humanity—Kierkegaard’s vision of belovedness before achievement—and to practice agape toward others and ourselves. The result is a bracing, hopeful vision: strive for truth, craft, and contribution, not for status; pursue excellence as stewardship, not self-exaltation.

If you’re weary of the status treadmill yet still hungry to do meaningful work, this conversation will give you categories, language, and practices to recalibrate your aims. Listen, reflect, and share with someone who needs a healthier way to win. If the episode resonates, subscribe, leave a review, and let us know your thoughts.

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