Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice EP 275: Kelly Chase Interview: Understanding Attachment Theory, Becoming Secure, & Releasing the Past with Special Guest Dr. Morgan Pt. 2
PART TWO! Kelly Chase and I had such a powerful first interview, we needed to continue the conversation.
We dove deep into topics such as securely attached sex, and situationships.
Here is a total breakdown of what was covered:
Avoidant Attachment and Its Difficulties [5:23]
“People with avoidant attachment struggle with reassurance. There is a lot of uncertainty. Everything in the relationship is confusing, but the sex is good. ”
- The Shame in Needing Sex [13:42]
“Women feel guilty about needing it, but hey maybe the way your relationship has functioned only allows you to feel connected and safe when you have sex. Sex is one of the many ways you can connect with your partner.”
- Securely Attached Sex [15:02]
“What a lot of people need to realize is that when your energy is not going to the drama or the unpredictability, it can go into the deepening of building a life and having wonderful experiences with someone. Safe and secure is sexy.”
- Having the Courage to Say Something [20:54]
“In order to have the relationship that you want and make it sustainable of course, you have to tune in to yourself, speak up and voice what’s going on. We can be assertive and redirect.”
- Fear of Starting the Life Over [26:19]
“Do you want to spend a life of suffering for the rest of your life or do you want to go through the temporary pain of leaving the relationship? Go through the temporary pain, avoid the lifetime of suffering.”
- Couple’s Therapy and Uncoupling [28:52]
“Successful couple’s therapy is not the couples staying together, it’s doing what’s best for the couples and individuals and sometimes that is uncoupling. Sometimes, that is the very best thing.”
“Uncoupling is intentionally dissolving a romantic relationship, and creating a new type of relationship in that process.”
- Failures in Dating [37:56]
“There’s no failure in dating, there’s only learning.”
- Forgetting and Forgiveness [42:06]
“Your pain is valid. Your experience is valid. Forgiveness is just deciding you’re not going to carry around the anger.”
- Being Honest with Yourself [49:00]
“You get to be honest with yourself about the kind of relationship that you want, and how you want to feel.”
Make sure you connect with Kelly on IG @chaselifewithkelly
You can also check out her podcast: Chase Life with Kelly - available everywhere podcasts are aired.
If this episode inspired you to take action in your dating life, I want to invite you to apply to the Empowered.Secure.Loved. Program.
If you’re ready to get off the dating rollercoaster and become the securely attached version of you; I want to invite you to apply to the E.S.L. program today.
The time is NOW to intentionally invest in your healing.