Emily Nagoski is a best-selling author and sex educator renowned for her transformative work in sexual health. She shares her journey from clinical neuropsychology to advocating for women's sexual wellness. Key topics include the importance of body positivity, navigating personal and professional challenges, and the significance of storytelling in education. Emily also discusses her experiences writing with her twin sister and how neurodivergence has shaped her career. Her insights aim to empower listeners to embrace their unique paths in intimacy and sexuality.
Emily Nagoski's journey from a peer health educator to a bestselling author underscores the transformative impact of accessible sexual health education.
In her work, Nagoski challenges misconceptions about women's sexuality, advocating for a more nuanced understanding of responsive desire over spontaneous desire.
Her latest book, 'Come Together', emphasizes the importance of self-compassion and communication in sustaining intimacy within long-term relationships.
Deep dives
The Impact of Peer Health Education
The journey of Emily Nagowski highlights the significant role of peer health education in shaping her career. Initially a psychology major, Nagowski became a peer health educator, working to promote sexual health and violence prevention among students. This hands-on experience not only solidified her passion for educating others but also provided her with the tools needed to communicate complex topics in an accessible manner. Through this role, she discovered how important it is to create non-judgmental spaces for discussions around sexuality, which would be foundational to her later work as an author and educator.
Transitioning from Academia to Writing
Emily Nagowski transitioned from her role as a college lecturer and wellness educator to a full-time author and speaker after realizing the need for broader outreach in sexual health education. Her bestselling book 'Come As You Are' stemmed from her students' feedback, revealing that many felt reassured by the information provided about normal sexual experiences. This response motivated her to disseminate these empowering messages on a larger scale, ultimately leading her to leave her academic position. The journey was challenging but rewarding, marking a significant shift in her career focus and approach to education.
Challenging Misconceptions in Sexual Health
Throughout her work, Nagowski confronts long-standing misconceptions surrounding women's sexuality, emphasizing the need for accurate and inclusive information. She critiques the prevalent narratives that portray women as 'broken' compared to men, advocating instead for understanding the natural variations in sexual experiences. Her research highlighted the importance of recognizing responsive desire, which contrasts with the culturally dominant idea of spontaneous desire. By reframing these discussions, she aims to empower individuals to trust their bodies and appreciate their unique sexual journeys.
The Importance of Self-Compassion in Sexual Relationships
In her latest work, 'Come Together,' Nagowski discusses the intricacies of maintaining intimacy in long-term relationships, emphasizing the role of self-compassion. She openly shares her struggles with intimacy, particularly during the writing process, which affected her personal relationship. Through research and personal experience, she identifies key factors for sustaining sexual connections, such as authenticity, vulnerability, and open communication. This exploration underscores the idea that the quality of relationships is less about maintaining a 'spark' and more about fostering a supportive and understanding environment.
Embracing Neurodiversity in Personal and Professional Spaces
Nagowski reflects on her personal experiences with neurodiversity, revealing how it influenced her career trajectory and interactions within the professional environment. She emphasizes the need for acknowledgment and support for neurodivergent individuals, specifically referencing how her differences impacted her training and early career. By openly discussing her neurodivergence, Nagowski advocates for a more inclusive approach in addressing mental health and communication in educational settings. This advocacy reinforces the importance of recognizing diverse cognitive processing styles as valuable assets in both personal and professional realms.
Emily Nagoski is a best-selling author, researcher, and sex educator. Emily studied psychology in college, and a fateful job as a peer health educator drew her immediately to the field of sex education and violence prevention. She went on to receive a master’s degree in counseling psychology and a PhD in health behavior. After working as a researcher at the famed Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction, she took a job at Smith College, where she lectured and was the director of wellness education. After teaching a class on women’s sexuality, the thing her students said they took away most from the class was that their bodies were normal. She knew that she was onto something powerful and wrote Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life to help women understand their own sexuality. The book was a huge hit, and eventually, Emily left her job to write and speak full-time. Over the last five years, Emily has written two more books, including this year’s Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections.
