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Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled
Why Bribes and Threats Aren't Helpful (and What to Do Instead)
Oct 13, 2020
A parent's struggle with using bribes and threats to manage behavior highlights the pitfalls of such tactics. It explores how these methods can damage intrinsic motivation and relationships. Instead, the conversation emphasizes the power of setting loving boundaries to create security and trust. By shifting focus to honest communication, parents can foster cooperation and emotional healing. It's a journey of moving away from fear-based approaches towards more respectful and effective parenting strategies.
20:47
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Quick takeaways
- Using bribes and threats undermines children's intrinsic motivation and can lead to negative consequences in their interests and behaviors.
- Establishing clear boundaries is crucial for children's development, providing them with security and promoting a cooperative parent-child relationship.
Deep dives
The Consequences of Bribing Children
Using bribes and threats to motivate children can undermine their intrinsic motivation and lead to negative consequences. Research highlighted the negative impact of a summer reading program that offered rewards, which ultimately reduced children's interest in reading for enjoyment. This shift occurs because children begin to perceive activities they once enjoyed as tasks requiring external incentives. By valuing intrinsic motivation, parents can help children maintain their natural interests without molding them into compliant individuals who only perform tasks for rewards.
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Discover
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