Learn negotiation tips from a former FBI hostage negotiator. Discover strategies for securing a raise, navigating job offers, and advancing in your career. Explore the importance of active listening, collaborative approaches, and aligning requests with company goals. Hear about the Black Swan technique for successful business and personal interactions.
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Quick takeaways
Successful negotiation involves collaboration and joint problem-solving for better outcomes.
Active listening is vital for grasping others' needs and providing suitable solutions.
Establishing durable, mutually beneficial relationships through transparent communication and integrity is essential for successful negotiations.
Deep dives
Establishing a Productive Collaboration Through Negotiation
To negotiate successfully is to collaborate and find better outcomes. Understanding the importance of negotiating with, not against, others is key. Successful negotiation involves joint problem-solving with different aspects of the same issue. The speaker highlights the goal of establishing a productive, long-term, mutually beneficial relationship.
Effective Listening and Understanding Needs
Listening to others is crucial to grasp their needs effectively. By actively listening, one can uncover and understand what others truly want. The podcast emphasizes the significance of listening to elicit needs and desires, enabling the provision of suitable solutions. Active listening skills are highlighted as essential for successful negotiations.
Collaborating for Mutual Success
Negotiation should aim for durable, mutually beneficial agreements. It is crucial to establish relationships based on proactive listening and attention. The concept of 'never being so sure of what you want that you wouldn't take something better' is emphasized. Establishing collaborative, goal-oriented, and prosperous relationships is key.
Severing Negative Relationships for Growth
Ending negative relationships, whether in business or personal life, is sometimes necessary for growth. The speaker advises against fixating on fixing bad employers or employees, advocating for moving on to better matches. Re-evaluating relationships and acting decisively to end detrimental ties can lead to personal and professional growth.
The Importance of Tackling Conflict Head-On
Avoiding conflict by deferring it can lead to prolonged pain and repetitive arguments. It is crucial to address conflicts directly to prevent prolonged discomfort and unresolved issues. By identifying problems, openly discussing them, and finding mutual solutions, conflicts can be resolved more effectively, preventing long-term negative consequences and repetitive fights.
The Power of Listening and Honesty in Negotiation
Effective negotiation involves active listening and honest communication to understand the other party's needs. Truthfulness and transparency are essential in building sustainable relationships and achieving successful outcomes. By prioritizing listening, understanding motivations, and maintaining integrity in negotiations, individuals can create lasting collaborations and reach mutually beneficial agreements.
Dr. Jordan Peterson speaks with author, teacher, and prior hostage negotiator Chris Voss. They discuss the necessity of prioritizing needs and wants, how to navigate the job market to fit your best potential, how and why to go after a raise, the primacy of invitational collaboration over compelled, and how Voss succeeded in many real-world hostage negotiations.
Chris Voss has served as the lead international kidnapping negotiator for the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), the hostage negotiation representative for the National Security Council’s Hostage Working Group, and the lead Crisis Negotiator for the NYC division of the FBI. Chris was a member of the New York City Joint Terrorist Task Force for 14 years, a recipient of the Attorney General’s Award for Excellence in Law Enforcement, and the FBI Agents Association Award for Distinguished and Exemplary Service. Chris has taught business negotiation courses at the University of Southern California, Georgetown University, and Harvard University. He has also guest lectured at Northwestern University and at schools abroad. Currently, Chris works with Insite Security as their Managing Director of the Kidnapping Resolution Practice.
- Links -
2024 tour details can be found here https://jordanbpeterson.com/events
Peterson Academy https://petersonacademy.com/
For Chris Voss:
On Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thefbinegotiator/?hl=en
On X https://twitter.com/fbinegotiator?lang=en
Sign up for Chris Voss’s Newsletter https://www.blackswanltd.com/no-oriented-questions
“Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It” (book) https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Learn to negotiate with the Black Swan Group https://www.blackswanltd.com/
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