Kids who have been hurt inside connection and relationship protect themselves from getting hurt again.
This can leave us feeling that they don't want connection.
Which leaves us feeling like we don't want to offer connection. It starts to hurt too bad to keep offering something so vulnerable when we keep getting rejected.
Maybe it would help to know that humans need connection to survive. Your child may be acting like they don't need or want connection, but they do.
In fact, the intensity with which they work to reject connection is the intensity with which they've been hurt in connection.
It feels hopeless, sometimes (or much of the time) to love a person who rejects connection.
It feels hopeless but it isn't hopeless. In fact, in this episode I'll tell you what that hopeless really is.
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The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}