Ep. #80: Coming Out Late In A Hetero Marriage, Part 1

Thirty-two years ago, 16-year old David, the new kid in high school, bravely squished his way through a wall of Monique’s clique of high school friends, (congregated around her locker in the hallway), and asked a mutual friend to introduce him to Monique - in front of everyone. That brave move earned David the intrigue and attention of Monique; AND earned David the honor of walking with her to their next class together. It also earned them both the distinct pleasure of nearly three decades of marriage, built on a deep, deep bond of friendship, love and mutual respect. Their lives together were not immune to the typical stressors of married life - but nothing could have prepared either of them for the curveball that life would throw at them in 2019, and the years that followed.. 

In this episode you will … 

• The importance of gay-representation in our upbringings - no matter the level of affluence we grew up with.
• Hindsight really IS 20/20, when looking back, Monique can definitely identify signs of stereotypical queerness in her young childhood experiences.
• In the words of Glennon Doyle, “...I knew how to be desired, I didn’t know desire.” How has that quote come into play in Monique’s Coming Out Late story?
• The kissing scene in the movie “Bad Moms” awakened something in Monique.
• Despite their staunchly different backgrounds and upbringings, we learn how Monique & David’s lifelong friendship and soulful connection were the building blocks of their thirty-plus year relationship. But is their solid foundation of love and alignment enough to sustain their marriage through Monique’s Coming Out Late journey? That question is definitely addressed.
• Learn about the depth and breadth of research that Monique and her husband David have done, and continue to do, (both individually AND together), in order to learn as much as they can about how other couples navigate ‘Mixed Orientation Marriages”. They are reading books and articles; they’ve joined ‘Mixed Orientation’ support groups and Monique has joined Robin’s weekly “Not-Straight Support Group”, and Robin’s “Coming Out Late” Facebook Group as well as other lesbian groups; they’ve watched movies and videos; listened to podcasts and youtube interviews, and together, through a mutual dedication to “communication” make the time to talk together about what they’re learning and how, if at all, do they want to try integrating any of what they’re learning into their relationship to one another.
• Learn the unique ways in which Monique & David are blazing their own path when it comes to reinventing their sexual intimacy and desires.
• Wanna support our “Coming Out Late” podcast? Then please consider buying Robin a “virtual” coffee as a sign of your appreciation. Simply go to: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/RobinDouglass

Links to resources:

PRIVATE ONE-on-ONE COACHING w/ROBIN DOUGLASS

If you are struggling to make sense-of and MANAGE this new aspect of your COMING OUT LATE life - AND the people IN your life affected by your COMING OUT LATE? Then I encourage you to send me an email and request the information sheet on my one-on-one coaching. It REALLY DOES make a BIG difference to have someone like myself who really ‘gets you’, who has been through it and who can help YOU decide what the best course of action is for YOU. I can give you references from women I am currently working with. And something I offer is unlimited, asynchronous communication IN BETWEEN our meeting sessions, so you’ll ALWAYS have me in your hip-pocket to turn to. Email me at: Comingoutlater@gmail.com to request my Coaching Info Sheet. I’m reasonably priced, offer you flexible ways you can use your sessions and am always onl