Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell 260: When the Higher Desire Spouse Stops Initiating - What to Do in Four Steps
Aug 22, 2025
What happens when one spouse suddenly stops initiating intimacy? This can lead to feelings of rejection and disconnection for both partners. Discover four practical steps to navigate this tricky situation and rebuild your emotional bond. Tune in to hear a real couple's journey and learn how to foster understanding instead of blame. The advice shared aims to help you untangle intimacy issues and reignite that spark in your marriage.
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One Partner Often Initiates More
- One spouse often naturally initiates sex more because they have higher desire and that's normal in many marriages.
- Being pursued can fuel the other partner's erotic orientation and create healthy sexual dynamics.
Jeff And Jennifer's Standoff Story
- Jeff was the higher desire spouse who pursued and initiated romance and sex regularly in their marriage.
- After chronic rejections, Jeff told Jennifer he would stop initiating and hoped she would fill the vacuum, which started the standoff.
Pressure Backfires On Desire
- Stopping initiation can create pressure on the other partner, which often shuts down their desire rather than motivating them.
- The resulting silence typically increases distance and criticism, deepening the cycle of rejection.