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On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Tom Holland ON: How to Overcome Social Anxiety & Beneficial Life Lessons You Can Learn From Family
Jul 10, 2023
01:54:19
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Quick takeaways
- Overcoming social anxiety by giving up alcohol and experiencing mental clarity and health benefits.
- Lessons learned from father's resilience in handling setbacks and criticism, inspiring perseverance and improvement mindset.
- Value of strong family bonds in providing a sense of connection and safety, shaping desire for future family priorities.
- Transitioning from dancing to acting career by chance, finding passion in creativity and collaboration on film sets.
- Finding peace and enjoyment in disconnecting from work pressures through engaging in golf, reflecting true self in the sport.
Deep dives
Tom Holland's Journey to Sobriety
Tom Holland discusses his decision to give up drinking and the challenges he faced. He initially started with a dry January, then continued for two more months as a personal challenge. Eventually, he decided to go for six months without alcohol and began experiencing the health benefits and mental clarity that came with it. He found support from friends and made positive replacements for drinking. Now, he is over a year and a half sober and feels happier, healthier, and more fulfilled without alcohol.
Tom Holland's Resilience and Sharpened Work Ethic
Tom Holland credits his father's resilience and work ethic for shaping his own mindset. Seeing his father's dedication to his career as a comedian, despite facing setbacks and challenges, inspired Tom to adopt a similar approach in his own life. He learned to persevere through tough times, brushing off criticism and failures, and continually striving to improve. This mindset has helped him handle the highs and lows of his acting career and remain focused on his goals.
Tom Holland's Close-knit Family and Solid Foundation
Tom Holland attributes his strong bond with his family to his parents' presence and support while growing up. Despite his father's volatile career as a comedian and his mother's work as a photographer, they were always available and present for Tom and his siblings. This solid family foundation instilled in him a sense of feeling connected and safe. Growing up in a secure family environment has shaped his desire to someday have children and prioritize being present for them.
Tom Holland's Journey to Acting
Tom Holland stumbled into acting by chance. Initially passionate about dancing, he was spotted at a dance class and chosen to audition for a show on the West End, ultimately landing the role in Billie Elliot. From there, he continued to pursue acting and found success in films. Acting became his career path, and he developed a love for the creativity and collaboration found on film sets. Despite his initial reservations about the industry, he discovered a deep passion for acting and a desire to continue growing in the field.
The humbling experience of swimming with killer whales
Tom shares his experience of swimming with killer whales in Mexico, recounting the unique encounter and the adrenaline rush it provided. He reflects on the humbling nature of being in the presence of such powerful creatures and the lasting impact it had on him.
Finding authenticity amid the Hollywood industry
Tom discusses the importance of staying true to himself and maintaining his authenticity in an industry like Hollywood. He shares his perspective on not getting caught up in the Hollywood hype, finding balance between work and personal life, and focusing on what truly brings him happiness.
Trusting gut instincts and making decisions
Tom describes how he follows his instincts and relies on his gut feelings when making decisions. He emphasizes the value of being in tune with oneself and making choices that align with personal values and beliefs.
Finding himself through playing golf
Tom reveals that he feels most like himself when playing golf. He describes golf as a humbling sport that challenges and engages him mentally. The sport allows him to disconnect from work and other pressures, providing a sense of peace and enjoyment.
Encountering Mountain Gorillas in their Natural Habitat
One of the main ideas discussed in the podcast episode is the experience of encountering mountain gorillas in their natural habitat. The speaker highlights the unique nature of this experience, where visitors embark on hikes to find the gorillas based on the knowledge and expertise of experienced guides. The speaker shares their skepticism initially but expresses amazement at the moment when they actually saw a family of 20 gorillas, including two impressive silverbacks. The speaker also mentions the importance of maintaining respect and following certain protocols, such as making a specific sound to convey peaceful intentions when near the gorillas.
Admiration for Athletes and Musicians
Another main point discussed in the podcast is the speaker's admiration for athletes and musicians. They express their fascination with the abilities and achievements of these individuals, highlighting their humble nature and their ability to recognize and appreciate greatness in others. The speaker mentions specific athletes and musicians they admire, emphasizing their skill, mental fortitude, and ability to come back from setbacks. They also note the impact that these individuals have had on their own life and the importance of being mentored by people, even if one has not directly met them.
Are you ready to embark on a transformative journey filled with inspiring stories and profound insights?
Join me in this enlightening episode where my guest and I tap into a wide range of topics that will leave you with a deeper understanding of life, personal growth, and finding true happiness.
Today, I am joined by Tom Holland, widely known for his portrayal of the Marvel superhero Spider-Man in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Beyond acting, Tom Holland is known for his friendly and charismatic personality, often delighting fans with his playful interactions and energetic interviews.
Have you ever wondered about the value of opinions from the people you truly care about? Discover the profound lessons we can learn from those who have impacted our lives and how their guidance can shape our journey.
In a world where many of us struggle with living a false version of ourselves, let us explore the strategies to break free from societal pressures and embrace your authentic self, finding the peace and fulfillment you truly deserve.
We challenge stereotypes as we uncover the beauty of embracing diverse interests, exploring the connection between physical activity and mental well-being, walking away from certain situations that no longer serve you, and learn the valuable lessons on self-acceptance and mindfulness, and discover the transformative power of connecting with nature.
This episode was recorded at Soho House Dean Street
In this episode with Tom Holland, you'll learn:
- How a solid family foundation shapes our childhood
- How to be resilient when facing numerous challenges
- The importance of taking care of our mental health
- How to embrace our own uniqueness
- How to channel our emotions in constructive ways
- Find alternatives to avoid making bad decisions
- Walk away from situations that don't serve our purpose
- How to cheer for someone to never give up
Learn to break free from stereotypes by embracing your authenticity.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
What We Discuss:
- 00:00 Intro
- 00:46 Growing up in a family with a solid foundation and living the best childhood
- 06:18 Finding value in the opinions of people you care about and the lessons we can learn from them
- 08:19 When you see someone who never gives up and continues to work hard, what would you do?
- 09:32 How to stop living a false version of your life and take care of your mental health
- 14:24 Diagnosed with dyslexia at an early age and finding a way to overcome the challenges that comes with it
- 16:17 Acting started as a hobby turned into a beloved creative work
- 18:34 Being that kid who plays rugby but also attends a dancing class
- 25:05 Have you thought about releasing anger through sports training like boxing?
- 30:46 Recognizing that drinking can become a problem and finding the strength to control the urge to drink
- 41:44 The beauty of being alcohol-free and still have fun with the people around you
- 45:20 What would you do when you meet a person who is truly at peace with who they are?
- 49:20 Reconnecting with nature and finding yourself in these nature trips
- 52:39 Would you love to attend a class about life and how to live on a daily basis?
- 57:45 Separating your personal emotions and your work emotions to keep yourself mentally healthy
- 01:02:57 The challenges of relocating in a new place and the intention behind the move
- 01:09:27 Would you rely on your inner instinct in making a decision?
- 01:15:35 Sometimes walking out of certain situations can be beneficial for you
- 01:19:56 If you’re having a bad day, do you play golf?
- 01:23:45 Have you heard of living a no proof life? Tom tells us how to be more present in these moments
- 01:36:35 How humility plays a role in how one handles loses and distractions
- 01:40:31 Let’s talk about sports
- 01:44:52 Tom on Final Five
Episode Resources:
Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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