The Secure Love Podcast with Julie Menanno Session 17: Understanding the Anxious Partner - The Path to Accountability (Pt. 1)
Jan 6, 2026
In this insightful session, Brian, a father navigating relationship challenges, shares his journey of breaking generational cycles, particularly how he supported his daughter through bullying. He reveals his struggles with perfectionism like roots in childhood traumas and the impact of a cruel teacher. Brian uncovers how his tendency to overfunction has strained his marriage, acknowledging his role in a negative cycle. The conversation explores the cost of chronic stress on relationships, prompting listeners to reflect on their own 'bad behavior' in relationships.
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Father-Daughter Breakthrough After Bullying
- Brian drove his daughter and stayed with her emotionally while she processed bullying instead of saying "toughen up."
- She felt lighter the next day, showing attachment work ripples into family healing.
Short Fuse Is Nervous System Exhaustion
- Brian's short fuse stems from an exhausted nervous system built by lifelong over-functioning and unprocessed grief.
- Addressing childhood shame is necessary for lasting behavior change in the marriage.
Name The Fear And Share The Grief
- Do the self-work: identify the fear under your triggers and sit with the grief those moments point to.
- Then vulnerably share that history and need with your partner so they can support you without overcompensating.
