Create Your Now with Kristianne Wargo 3009 Are You a Quiet Quitter?
Your marriage is worth the fight. And that doesn't mean the yelling and screaming type of fight.
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The fight that says, "I'm all in to figure out what's not working between us."
But sometimes, that's not the way it turns out. You come home, and disagreements are on the rise. After a long day at work, who wants to face the crazy at home? All you want is calm and quiet.
So that's where you go, to the calm and quiet.
- The less you confront the problem, the less you fight.
- The less you complain about not having things the way you want them, the less whining you hear from your spouse.
- The less you speak, the less you have to defend.
This does not sound very appealing. But it is a survival skill when you want peace in the home.
So how do you handle confrontations and disagreements?
Are you one who pushes back and express openly? Or are you a quiet quitter who doesn't want to face any more disruptions to peace?
Disagreements and confrontations are bound to happen if you are married for more than two weeks. And usually, it only takes 1-week max to have some mild fuss.
No one wants to live that kind of life, let alone have that type of marriage.
So how do stay clear of becoming a quiet quitter?
You gotta be loud to be heard.
The K.I.S.S. ~ Be L.O.U.D. to be heard!Now, I'm not condoning yelling and screaming here. This loud I'm referring to is a simple way to remember how you can impact your marriage by how you communicate.
So how can you be L.O.U.D. to be heard?
1. L - Listen actively to your spouse's point of view. You have two ears for a reason. First off, if both spouses would listen more than they talk, then there would be fewer arguments because each person would be heard. But if neither have the opportunity to be heard, there's always a struggle. So a fight is inevitable. Don't live that life. Listen actively to your partner's point of view or perspective.
2. O - Open up and express your thoughts and feelings honestly. Nowadays, no one knows how to be honest with each other. Relationships are based on a circle with a cropped picture using filters, and stories that sound good overall. You can paint yourself however you want to appear to your spouse. Honesty is hard to come by from the beginning. So be different. Base your relationship on honesty so you can build trust over time. And be sure to include your thoughts and feelings as to what's happening. Brushing things under the rug just leads to bigger dust bunnies; they're called tumbleweeds.
3. U - Understand your spouse's perspective and take their feelings into consideration. If you want to be understood, then so does your sweetheart. Lean into what makes them tick. How they are feeling about circumstances. Communication goes both ways.
4. D - Demonstrate your love and commitment to the relationship through actions and compromises. Marriage is a two-way street, and if it's love, that means there are actions that reflect your love for your spouse. So let your heart shine! If you truly love someone, there are going to be compromises. Love is a verb. Keep your love alive by using actions to support your words.
By being L.O.U.D. in this way, you can create open communication. That allows you as a couple to work together to build a stronger foundation for your marriage.
PRAYER: May the struggles of life not collapse the love for your spouse. Take deep breaths, and remind yourself often of your spouse's beautiful heart. Life is not easy, but it can be joy-filled and wonderful as you continually build a strong foundation. And most of all, love your spouse, as Christ loves you!
"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"
#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage
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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson
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Music by Mandisa - Overcomer
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Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music - Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.