Codependent Doctor 60: Loving Someone with Addiction: How to Set Boundaries Without Shame
Oct 29, 2025
In this engaging discussion, Donna Marston, a certified recovery support worker and founder of Sharing Without Shame, shares her transformative journey as a mother of a child in addiction. She emphasizes the critical difference between support and enabling, revealing how setting boundaries sparked real change. Donna addresses the silent grief of loving someone with addiction and offers practical strategies for managing unhealthy dynamics. Her insights on reclaiming self-compassion and utilizing energy healing methods enrich the conversation and provide hope for healing.
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Turning Point On Mother's Day
- Donna Marston described her son's addiction starting at 15 and the decade-long downward spiral that followed.
- She hit 'enough' and a Mother's Day boundary led him to enter treatment and eventually long-term recovery.
Reframe Shameful Labels
- Donna reframes shaming labels like 'codependent' into the term 'unhealthy helping' to reduce blame.
- Unhealthy helping means doing for someone what they can and should do for themselves.
Provide Needs Without Enabling
- Do set clear, practical boundaries like offering food or blankets but not cash or gift cards that can be sold for drugs.
- Do avoid giving bank cards, merchandise cards, or money that can be diverted to substance use.
