Leadership Unlocked: The Operating System Every Executive Leader Needs to Delegate Effectively & Foster Accountability So You Can Stop Managing Alone and Start Leading a Team Again Being Nice Is Killing Your Team—Here’s What to Do Instead - E42
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Jan 7, 2026 Explore why being 'nice' can actually undermine team performance. The host delves into how kindness fosters improvement and a culture of accountability. Discover the neuroscience behind feedback and how poorly delivered messages can trigger defensiveness. Learn a structured approach to giving feedback that emphasizes team benefits over personal discomfort, plus the powerful 'Because of you, we' framework that encourages collaboration. Get practical tips for preparing and navigating tough conversations, reinforcing the importance of clarity and genuine care.
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Brilliant Leader Staying Silent
- Dusty observed a brilliant leader who spoke only a few times over two days and left valuable insights unused.
- He concluded she stayed silent out of a desire to be nice rather than being kind to the team.
Nice Protects You; Kind Serves The Team
- Dusty defines nice as telling people what they want to hear and kind as saying what they need to hear.
- Nice protects the speaker's comfort while kind serves the recipient's growth.
Feedback Often Triggers Threat Responses
- Critical feedback triggers the brain's threat system, making it feel like a social threat or physical pain.
- Softening feedback without strategy often still activates defensive responses and stalls growth.