They Lied to You About Being a Man (Here’s the TRUTH) w/ Dr. Matt Englar-Carlson

Dr. Matt Englar-Carlson has spent decades studying the psychology of masculinity. He has worked directly with men to help them navigate mental health challenges. He is an esteemed professor and department chair at California State University. As a leading expert on positive masculinity, he brings a nuanced perspective to the conversation. His research focuses on strength-based therapy. It shows how men can use their natural strengths to improve mental well-being. Instead of suppressing emotions, they can embrace them for better mental health.

But Englar-Carlson’s interest in this field is personal. “My dad was a psychologist,” he shares. “I was close to him, and I grew up in the field.” As a child, he attended psychology conferences and observed his father, a small-town therapist. This gave him a deep understanding of the mental health profession. He also gained insight into the unique challenges men face when seeking help. These experiences shaped his perspective on the importance of mental well-being for men. “I had a lot of exposure to what therapy was, and it wasn’t a strange thing for me.”

But, when he started working as a counsellor, he noticed a trend. “Most of my caseload was male, and they had been suffering for a long time before coming in,” he explains. Many men wait until they are in crisis before seeking help. He argues that men’s reluctance to seek help is linked to social expectations and gender roles. These pressures discourage men from showing vulnerability.