Special education teacher Aggie seeks advice on staying calm and composed when already late. Strategies for managing lateness with ADHD, self-compassion, stress management, and time organization are discussed in the episode.
Practicing self-compassion and reframing apologies into gratitude can shift the narrative from self-criticism to understanding when facing lateness.
Deep breathing exercises can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, aiding in calming the body and mind during stressful situations like being late.
Deep dives
Acceptance and Compassion in Dealing with Lateness
It is important to acknowledge that lateness can happen to anyone, not just individuals with ADHD. Accepting this reality and practicing self-compassion can help shift the narrative from self-criticism to understanding. By giving ourselves grace when we are running late and reframing apologies into gratitude for others' patience, we create a more positive atmosphere.
Utilizing Deep Breathing Techniques for Calming the Nervous System
When facing a stressful situation like being late, our prefrontal cortex, responsible for rational decision-making, can be impaired. Deep breathing exercises can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, helping to calm the body and mind. By focusing on slow, controlled breaths and practicing before stressful events, individuals can reset their nervous system and improve their ability to think clearly.
Developing Proactive Strategies for Timeliness
To avoid constant lateness, individuals can implement proactive measures such as keeping essential items in designated places, adding buffer time for unexpected delays, and using timers and alarms to stay on track. By being prepared ahead of time and actively managing time perception, individuals with ADHD can improve their punctuality and reduce the stress associated with rushing.
We’ve got another listener question today, this time from my friend Aggie:
Hi, Will, Aggie here. Longtime listener, first time caller. To give listeners context, you and I did admin work together and accountability coaching groups. Then we actually got to meet in person at the Chad conference before COVID hit. I myself have a background as a special education teacher, uh, specializing in severe disabilities and autism specific programs. So behavior is one of my strong skills. Implementing understanding. and executing behavior interventions. My question is this, planning and scheduling and time tracking are all great preventative strategies.Do you have any insight or resources around when you know you're already late, probably rushing, and you're trying to stay calm and collected and still show up the way you want to, Even when you were already late. So I'm trying not to show up flustered and discombobulated. I'm thinking maybe some people have coping strategies or other people can share what they do to, to do what I described and give me a jumping off point on how to reframe that emotional state.In the moment of slight or major panic. Would love to hear your ideas or other listeners ideas in response. And thank you so much for your podcast. You're seriously crushing it.
Thanks for the question; Aggie and I think this is an issue we can all relate to. Being late sucks. So, in this episode, we tackle the struggle of showing up calm and composed when maybe we don’t feel calm and collected. We’ll be looking at a number of tools that we can use to try and get ourselves in the right head space, as well as jumping into what we can do so that we might not be late quite as often. Sign up for my Newsletter Any And All Distractions Feel free to ask me a question on my Contact Page Find the full show notes at HackingYourADHD.com/177This Episode's Top Tips
Practice acceptance of your ADHD and that sometimes lateness will happen. Work on changing the narrative from self-criticism to understanding and try to give yourself some compassion when you’re running late.
Try reframing "I'm sorry I'm late" to "Thank you for your patience" to create a more positive atmosphere and show your gratitude when someone waits for you.
Deep breathing can be especially helpful in calming your nervous system - when we’re running late and stressed, our prefrontal cortex is impaired, and that makes rational decision-making harder. By slowing down and activating our parasympathetic nervous system through deep breathing, we can calm ourselves and get into the right headspace.
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