TED Talks Daily

What to do when you offend someone | Lambers Fisher

42 snips
Jul 23, 2024
Lambers Fisher, a marriage and family therapist, dives into the inevitable misunderstandings we face in relationships. He emphasizes that discomfort can lead to deeper connections and growth. Fisher explains how good intentions can inadvertently cause offense and encourages viewing disagreements as opportunities for empathy. He shares that ignorance about a partner can enhance dynamics and advocates for meaningful communication to rebuild trust. The key takeaway? Use moments of offense as stepping stones to strengthen your relationships.
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ANECDOTE

The Myth of the Perfect Couple

  • Lambers Fisher shares an anecdote about premarital couples who believe they've found "the one" because they never argue.
  • He uses this to illustrate the importance of accepting disagreement in healthy relationships.
INSIGHT

The Inevitability of Offense

  • Offenses are inevitable because there's no universal list of what's offensive.
  • What offends one person might not offend another, and it changes over time.
INSIGHT

The Root of Offense

  • Offense isn't always about right or wrong, but often triggers past hurts.
  • These past hurts make people fear future harm.
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