The Agile Daily Standup - AgileDad

How to Know What You Want

Mar 29, 2024

Exploring the influence of society on personal desires and how memetic desires shape what we want. Discussing the struggle to discern our authentic wishes amidst external influences, and advocating for embracing individuality for personal growth and self-discovery.

13:50

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Quick takeaways

Desires are often influenced by social emulation, leading individuals to mimic others' choices rather than follow genuine personal wants.

Self-knowledge and differentiation are crucial in understanding true desires and making choices based on personal well-being rather than conforming to societal norms.

Deep dives

Challenges in Identifying Personal Wants and Desires

Many individuals struggle with knowing what they truly want, often basing their desires on what others have. The theory of memetic desire suggests that people's wants are heavily influenced by social emulation. This leads to decisions motivated by fitting in rather than genuine personal desires. External factors like advertising further shape these desires, creating a cycle of mimicking others' choices.

Introduction

2min

Unpacking the Influence of Society on Personal Desires

2min

Navigating Societal Influences and Personal Happiness

3min

Embracing Individuality and Self-Discovery

5min

Embracing Differentiation for Personal Growth

2min

How To Know What You Want

What do you want? This is a difficult question to answer because for most, what they want is only a matter of how they feel. Their feelings and emotions are an intuitive guide; beckoning them to desire and be attracted to some things while forsaking and being repulsed by other things.

The only problem with this is that most people don’t know what they want; rather, they know what other people seem to have.

According to the theory of Memetic desire, much of what we want is the result of what other people have. Our single friends all get into relationships and suddenly we want to be in a relationship. Our friends all get the new iPhone and suddenly we want to make an upgrade. Our social instinct to “fit in” means that we largely mimic what others model.

If you are basing what you want on how you feel then you are likely to be misled to pursue what it seems other people have.

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