BO SEO: How to fix polarization? By disagreeing…more!
Apr 11, 2023
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Bo Seo, world champion debater and author, discusses the problem of polarization and the need for more constructive disagreement. He shares tips on making killer points, combatting bullshitters, and arguing with partners. They explore when to engage in disputes and the value of embracing disagreement. Strategies for navigating disagreements in relationships are also discussed. The importance of framing disagreements and persuasive arguments is highlighted.
Being persuasive is more important than being right and arguments should focus on showing the truth and importance of the main claim, as well as why it should change the other person's mind.
Productive engagement requires considering the perspectives and motivations of all participants while avoiding personal attacks or dominance shows.
Deep dives
The Importance of Disagreeing Well
Bo Siou, a two-time world debating champion, highlights the significance of engaging in good arguments and the need for improved disagreement tactics. He emphasizes that being persuasive is more important than being right, and that arguments should focus on showing the truth and importance of the main claim, as well as why it should change the other person's mind. Bo suggests using the framework of the four W's (what, why, when, and who cares) to structure arguments effectively. He also advises using techniques such as side switching to challenge one's own beliefs, and responding to bad faith arguments by exposing the lack of substance and demanding clearer positions. Bo believes that learning to argue well can lead to better conversations, deeper connections, and a more inclusive community.
Overcoming Fear and Dog Whistling in Debates
Bo Siou highlights the issue of fear and dog whistling dominating arguments, replacing substantive reasoning. He encourages asking for justification and substance behind objections and raising questions. Bo suggests focusing on the shared goal and demanding clearer positions from both sides rather than getting caught in a loop of fear-based objections. He emphasizes that productive engagement requires considering the perspectives and motivations of all participants while avoiding personal attacks or dominance shows. Bo believes that a citizenry that values and embraces good faith disagreement can resist manipulation and work towards positive change.
The Challenge of Disagreeing in Personal Relationships
Bo Siou examines the challenges of disagreement within personal relationships. He acknowledges the tendency in relationships to focus on trivial arguments or avoid disagreements altogether. Bo suggests distinguishing between the symbolic import of an argument and the actual issue at hand, such as household chores. He advises framing conversations intentionally and focusing on the substance of the disagreement, rather than getting lost in tangential issues. Bo also emphasizes the value of structure, intentionality, and utilizing the craft of debate to navigate personal disagreements effectively, fostering growth and deeper relationships.
The Indigenous Voice to Parliament Debate in Australia
Bo Siou addresses the ongoing debate in Australia regarding the Indigenous Voice to Parliament. He highlights the importance of avoiding fear-based objections and encouraging arguments grounded in substance when discussing key issues like closing the gap between Indigenous and non-Indigenous Australians. Bo suggests asking for specific justifications behind objections and alternate proposals. He also emphasizes the need to understand the democratic value of constructive argumentation within the context of referendums. Bo encourages citizens to engage in conversations that seek to find common ground, while demanding clarity and well-defined positions from both sides.
Bo Seo(world champion debater, author of Good Arguments) knows how to argue really very well.
The Australian immigrant, now based out of Harvard, is the two-time world debating champion and his new book applies his secret debating sauce to the meatloaf that is this polarised, bifurcated, relentlessly bickering world we now live in. Bo’s wild point is that the problem of polarization isn’t that we disagree, it’s that we need to disagree more. But I need to learn how to do it way better and kinder.
He talks us through how to make killer points; how to combat bullshitters, neg’ers and bullies; when to walk away; plus how to argue with your partner and not lose your shit. He also warns against not arguing. “The cost of being too agreeable is a small life,” he says. At a broader level, the cost is a world unhinged.