671 - "Please Be as Weird as Me" (making friends as an adult)
Feb 3, 2025
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Making friends as an adult can be tricky, but it's all about embracing your weirdness. The conversation contrasts fitting in with connecting authentically. A unique method for finding like-minded individuals is discussed, encouraging listeners to celebrate their individuality. Strategies for actively engaging in social environments are shared, reminding us that building connections requires initiative. Ultimately, it's about fostering genuine relationships that reflect who you truly are.
Fostering adult friendships requires prioritizing genuine connections over mere inclusion, embracing authenticity over conformity to societal norms.
Utilizing a proactive approach through engaging in passions and initiating conversations is vital for cultivating meaningful relationships.
Deep dives
The Challenge of Adult Friendships
Making friends as an adult presents unique challenges compared to earlier life stages. In youth, social connections are often easily formed due to shared environments in schools or workplaces, where factors like proximity naturally foster friendships. However, as adults, people become more guarded and discerning, requiring a deeper connection based on mutual understanding rather than mere inclusion. This shift creates a landscape where fostering friendships requires intentional efforts and a new mindset centered on authenticity and genuine connection.
The Please Be As Weird As Me Method
The concept of finding friendships revolves around the 'Please Be As Weird As Me' method, which prioritizes understanding over fitting in. As adults, the goal should be to seek out people who resonate with one's unique qualities rather than trying to conform to group norms for acceptance. This method emphasizes embracing one’s quirks and passions, creating an attractive persona that draws like-minded individuals. Recognizing that connections thrive when authenticity is prioritized allows for meaningful relationships built on shared experiences and ideas.
Practical Steps to Connect with Others
To actively cultivate friendships, three practical steps are highlighted: create an engaging life, go where your interests are welcomed, and take the initiative in friendship building. It’s essential to pursue interests that ignite passion and lead to opportunities for meeting others with similar values by participating in events or communities rather than being passive. This proactive strategy makes it easier to find connections and enhances the likelihood of forming lasting friendships. Lastly, making the first move becomes crucial in establishing these relationships, as it breaks the ice and fosters a more comfortable environment for connection.
In this episode, I talk about making friends as an adult. I talk about "fitting in" vs. "connecting" and a three-stop method for connecting with people who share your "weirdness."
My book, "That's Bold of you" is available on Amazon.
Instagram: @case.kenny
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