Conversations from the Heart #56 - How to Get More of What You Want: Difficult Family Member Edition
Navigating relationships with difficult family members can sometimes be a Herculean task.
This episode highlights four main strategies for walking the path of authentic communication with family members who can be hard to connect with:
1. Practicing the art of translating judgments into feelings and needs.
2. Maintaining deep connection with ourselves.
3. Locating the conversation in the present and not the past.
4. Melting defensiveness by creating enough internal capacity to be present to someone else's pain.
We discuss:
- 5:07 My family can be so judgmental. How can I communicate better with them?
- 6:26 How to practice translating judgments into feelings and needs.
- 16:10 The inside practice essential for staying grounded when someone else is activated.
- 19:17 "When we are helping someone else wake up to the dynamics of a situation, we want it to be as gentle as possible so they enjoy it and do more of it."
- 25:08 How can I establish trust with my brother who avoids me?
- 32:58 Want to change the same old complaint-filled conversation? Try locating the conversation in the present, not the past.
- 36:23 How can we begin melting defensiveness?
- 37:11 A script for moving forward when you need an answer and the other person is silent.
- 40:15 How to get more of what you want.
Something that can make it difficult for families to connect authentically with one another are the relational habits we fall into. This fall I'll be offering a practice group that dives deep into narcissism and shame and I'd love to see you there! Interested in learning more? Check out all the details.
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