3513 Sorry, Not Sorry

As the years pass for married couples, a subtle yet highly impactful dynamic often emerges--the issue of keeping score. While you might say 'sorry,' a whisper screams loudly in your head, "Sorry, not sorry."

But what toll does this subtle scoreboard mentality take on a relationship?

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And how can we shift this paradigm to foster growth and authentic connection within our unions?

How do you say you're sorry?

"Sorry is not just a word; it's an action!" ~ Kristianne Wargo

The K.I.S.S. ~ Make 'sorry' an action!

Here are three vital steps a spouse can take to truly understand the essence of saying sorry, and to align actions with intentions:

1. Embrace Vulnerability: Rather than viewing apologies as a sign of weakness or surrender, consider them as the ultimate display of vulnerability and strength within a relationship.

"Apologies pave the way for genuine communication and connection between spouses." ~ Kristianne Wargo

For instance, when addressing a past mistake, instead of offering a generic apology, delve deeper into the emotions behind the action. By articulating feelings and acknowledging their impact on your partner, you can lay the foundation for authentic reconciliation.

2. Practice Active Listening: Apologies lose their efficacy when NOT accompanied by active listening. Mirroring your partner's sentiments and validating their feelings can transform a superficial apology into a meaningful exchange.

"Listening is the bridge that connects two hearts." ~ Kristianne Wargo

Take the time to sincerely listen to your partner's perspective without interruptions or defensiveness. By demonstrating empathy and understanding, you can enhance the healing power of your apology and establish a mutual sense of respect within the relationship.

3. Cultivate Forgiveness: True apologies and forgiveness are intertwined in the intricate tapestry of relationships.

In the context of marital conflicts, forgiveness plays a pivotal role in moving beyond grievances and building a foundation of trust. By actively practicing forgiveness, both spouses can liberate themselves from the shackles of resentment and foster a climate of empathy and grace in their relationship.

"Forgiveness is not a one-time act, but a continuous choice to release resentment, embrace reconciliation, and build trust." ~ Kristianne Wargo

The art of saying sorry transcends mere words; it embodies a profound commitment to vulnerability, empathy, and forgiveness. By embracing these principles in our interactions with our spouses, we get to escape the confines of keeping score and cultivate a marriage grounded in mutual understanding and growth.

"Authentic apologies are not merely spoken – they are felt, understood, and lived well."

Strive to embody the essence of real apologies in your marriage, where saying sorry is not a mere phrase but a heartfelt expression of love and respect.

"Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!"

#RelationshipBuilders #CreateYourNow #LoveAndMarriage

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Cover Art by Jenny Hamson

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Music by Mandisa - Overcomer

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Song ID: 68209 Song Title: Overcomer Writer(s): Ben Glover, Chris Stevens, David Garcia Copyright © 2013 Meaux Mercy (BMI) Moody Producer Music (BMI) One Songs (ASCAP) Ariose Music (ASCAP) Universal Music - Brentwood Benson Publ. (ASCAP) D Soul Music (ASCAP) (adm. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com) All rights reserved. Used by permission.