Building Unshakable Confidence for Real Estate Agents

Aug 21, 2025

In this engaging discussion, Peter Parnegg, a seasoned real estate professional and Ninja Selling instructor, shares insights on building unshakable confidence in agents. He emphasizes that confidence is a skill developed through preparation and understanding market shifts. Peter explores the psychology of insecurity and offers actionable strategies like affirmations and mental rehearsal. The duo also highlights how reframing failure and cultivating a strong support network can elevate an agent's competence and success.

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INSIGHT

Insecurity Sabotages Performance

Insecurity quietly undermines business and interpersonal success.
Confidence and insecurity are opposite forces that shape behavior and results.

ANECDOTE

The Call That Feels Like Failure

Peter describes calling a neglected contact and fearing they won't remember him.
The point: being forgotten usually means they simply hadn't thought of you, not active dislike.

INSIGHT

Sub-Personalities Drive Reactions

We carry sub-personalities like doubters and wise selves that compete in moments of stress.
The loudest sub-personality often dictates emotion and behavior in client interactions.

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In today's episode of the Ninja Selling Podcast, Rob is joined by Peter Parnegg to discuss confidence in real estate. They explore why confidence can waver, especially when the market shifts, and explain how it is a skill that can be developed. This episode offers a path for agents looking to move from uncertainty to operating with a sense of competence.

The conversation covers the connection between preparation and performance, showing how confidence is earned. Rob and Peter explain how to turn nervous energy into excitement by trusting established systems. They also talk about the psychology of insecurity and provide methods, including affirmations and mental rehearsal, to change one's mindset. The hosts argue that addressing small, situational challenges helps agents build an identity-based confidence.

Episode Highlights:

Why systems are necessary for maintaining confidence in changing markets.
How to navigate the four stages of competence to build skill.
How to turn nervous energy into excitement through preparation.
Actionable methods to build confidence, like affirmations and practice.
How to reframe your perspective on failure and rejection for career growth.
How to manage the "catastrophizer" mindset in client interactions.
Why deep transactional knowledge increases confidence.
The goal of becoming "My Realtor" to 100 people in your sphere.

Key Takeaways:

"When there's a lot of success and money rolling around, it hides things."

"Insecurity is one of the gigantic underminers of all people's personal and business, interpersonal success."

"Confidence is earned through preparation. And if you're not confident, you're probably not prepared enough."

"Feeling nervous is your mind asking for more certainty."

"We have not spent enough time talking about what failure is and what failure isn't."

"Confidence feels like, 'I plan to.'"

"If you don't have a system, you're going to just be chasing emotions. With a system, you guide them."

"What would it look like to be so prepared that I feel excited instead of nervous? And that is confidence."

"Confidence, I think, is learning to balance the sense of failure is always possible, but is it terminal?"

"I need a hundred people to think of me as 'my realtor.'"

Links:

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