Have Our Boundaries Destroyed Our Sense of Community?
Apr 8, 2025
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The hosts share their vastly different childhood experiences around discussing relationships and sexuality. They dive into the complexities of being working parents, tackling challenges like 'mum guilt' and the pressures of school events. A poignant discussion uncovers how modern boundaries may be eroding our sense of community, with a heartfelt story about the support received during illness. The conversation wraps up by reflecting on the need for genuine connections in a convenience-driven world, questioning whether we've become too isolated.
Open communication within families fosters stronger connections and helps normalize discussions about personal topics, including relationships and sexual health.
The hosts discuss the challenges modern parents face in balancing work commitments with parental involvement, highlighting feelings of guilt and societal expectations.
They reflect on how individualism and convenience in modern lifestyles have weakened community ties, stressing the importance of genuine connections within neighborhoods.
Deep dives
Family Connections and Open Communication
The hosts share anecdotes about their families, highlighting the dynamics of open communication. One host reflects on her father's unwavering support and feedback on the podcast, emphasizing the importance of familial relationships in her life. Their families have fostered an environment where discussing personal topics, including relationships and sexual health, is normalized, leading to humorous moments and candid conversations. This openness helps in creating stronger connections, allowing for deeper discussions about emotions and experiences.
Manifestation and Its Effects
The conversation turns to the concept of manifestation and its potential to influence life events. One host recounts a recent instance where she mentioned not having experienced food poisoning, only to end up with severe symptoms shortly after. This leads to a discussion on the notion of 'anti-manifesting,' where negative thoughts seemingly bring about adverse events. They also explore how manifestation works in a way that goes beyond mere faith, considering it a part of goal-setting and maintaining a proactive mindset.
Balancing Work and Family Life
The hosts discuss the challenges working parents face in balancing professional responsibilities with attending significant events in their children's lives. One host expresses guilt over missing her child's Easter hat parade due to a pre-scheduled commitment, reflecting on the pressure placed on modern parents to be present at every important moment. They highlight how societal expectations of parental involvement can lead to feelings of inadequacy and worry about long-term effects on children. This conversation underscores the need for parents to prioritize self-compassion and perspective when navigating these dilemmas.
Community and Connection in Modern Life
The episode delves into the evolving concept of community as the hosts reflect on their personal experiences regarding neighborly relationships. They discuss how modern lifestyles, driven by convenience and individualism, often lead to less intimate community connections compared to previous generations. The impact of technology on social interactions is examined, suggesting that while platforms may connect people, they can also foster a sense of isolation. The hosts encourage listeners to consider the importance of building genuine connections within their neighborhoods and communities.
Navigating Friendship Dynamics
The discussion includes thoughts on friendship dynamics, particularly in relation to the obligations and expectations that come with them. The concept of 'people pleasing' is explored, as one host reflects on how her willingness to help others sometimes leads to superficial connections rather than deeper bonds. They talk about the struggle between maintaining boundaries and being available for friends, recognizing how busy lifestyles can hinder meaningful relationships. This gives rise to a broader commentary on the need to cultivate relationships that are reciprocal and supportive.
Hey lifers! Did you grow up in a house where you could openly chat about things like s3x? We’re on opposite ends of the scale on this one! Britt has reverse manifested and ended up with a pretty grim case of food poisoning. We end up having a chat about how we each feel about manifesting and goal setting.
If you have kids, do you experience ‘mum guilt’? Laura has a work commitment that means she can’t make something that is important to Marlie Mae. We speak about the expectations on parents these days when they’re also trying to juggle work.
Fleurine Tideman recently wrote a substack titled 'Enough with the boundaries; losing my stepfather showed me the community we're sacrificed for our so called 'boundaries'. She told the story of her step father who was battling terminal cancer when she noticed how much the neighbours and friends stepped up without even being asked to.
We spoke about our shift towards outsourcing everything so we don’t feel indebted to others and how we all seem to focus more on convenience.
We asked:
Do you think our inclination to set boundaries has removed our sense of community?
Does the idea of someone dropping over unannounced feel warm or anxiety inducing?
Do you know your neighbours?
Do you agree that in order to have a village, you have to be a villager?