Endless Attempts, Zero Progress: Can a Covert Narcissist Ever Wake Up?

You’ve researched. You’ve reasoned. You’ve shown empathy. You’ve tried again and again to help them see the truth—about their behavior, the damage, the disconnection. But nothing changes.

In this episode, Renee Swanson explores one of the most painful patterns survivors of covert narcissistic abuse face: the endless attempts to help, to explain, to connect—and the devastating realization that it never leads to real progress.

Through personal stories, listener reflections, and a powerful metaphor about stalled software updates, Renee unpacks why covert narcissists rarely "wake up," even when the truth is laid out in front of them. She shares what happens when you finally name the problem… and they still don’t (or won’t) see it. And she reminds you that your growth, your healing, and your peace don’t have to wait for someone else’s transformation.

Because when you’re the only one trying, it’s not a relationship—it’s a rescue mission.

DISCLAIMER:
The information provided by Renee Swanson, Covert Narcissism Podcast, and CNG Life Coaching is for educational purposes only and is not to be used for diagnosis purposes and not intended to be a substitute for clinical care. Please consult a health care provider for guidance specific to your case.

This material discusses narcissism in general. Renee shares stories from her personal experiences as well as from those she has talked with for several years. Her material does not claim that any specific person has narcissism and should not be used to refer to any specific person as having narcissism. Permission is not granted to link to or repost this material to support an allegation or support a claim that any specific person is a narcissist. That would be an unauthorized misuse of the material and information provided.