DIDDY TRIAL: Why She Didn't Leave: The Psychology of Love Bombing, Control, and Manipulation | Ep 5

Jun 9, 2025

Join Ann Burgess, a renowned criminal profiler specializing in trauma and abuse, as she engages with Lisa Bilyeu to dissect the gripping testimonies from the Diddy trial. They dive into the psychological complexities of love bombing and coercive control in abusive relationships. Listeners gain insights into why victims often remain silent, exploring the societal pressures and trauma responses that trap them. This conversation highlights the urgency of understanding these dynamics to empower survivors and challenge the status quo.

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INSIGHT

Trauma Freezes Victims' Responses

Women in extreme danger comply to survive and cannot simply escape abusive situations.
Trauma physiologically freezes victims, causing lasting fear and difficulty in speaking out.

ADVICE

Encourage Trust and Seek Help

Encourage victims to tell someone they trust and seek out support like shelters.
Understand the immense stress trauma imposes to provide meaningful help.

INSIGHT

Coercive Control Imprints Fear

Coercive control traps women, making it impossible to just leave abusive partners.
Fear imprints deeply in the brain’s limbic system, extending trauma over time.

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In this powerful two-part episode of Women of Impact, host Dr. Ann Burgess is joined by renowned criminal profiler Dr. Ann Burgess (yes, both as host and guest!) to break down the harrowing testimonies emerging from the Diddy trial. Focusing on the voices of women who have faced extreme danger and abuse, the episode exposes not just the acts themselves, but also the social and psychological mechanisms that keep survivors silent and trapped. Together, Dr. Burgess and Dr. Burgess delve into the chilling details of Brianna Bongoulan’s and Cassie’s experiences, emphasizing the importance of understanding trauma responses and the realities of coercive control.

Listeners are taken step by step through the dynamics of abusive relationships, the difficulties women face in coming forward, and the bystander dilemmas that keep entire communities quiet. Dr. Burgess shares expert insights into the physiology of trauma, societal victim-blaming, and the layered complications for friends and witnesses. If you’re looking for clarity on why women don’t or can’t “just leave,” and want to empower yourself or others with real-life strategies, don’t skip part one of this episode.

SHOWNOTES 00:00 - Chilling overview: Diddy’s alleged actions and why breaking silence matters
00:26 - Introducing Dr. Ann Burgess: expertise in criminal profiling
00:42 - The week's testimonies and the critical need to understand trauma
00:57 - Beginning with Brianna Bongoulan’s harrowing account
01:35 - Analyzing the extreme danger and survival tactics in abusive situations
03:37 - Physical and psychological aftershocks: photos, night terrors, and manipulation
04:33 - Why women freeze: terror, trauma physiology, and the impossibility of escape
06:06 - Addressing the question “Why go back?”—the reality of control
07:20 - What if it happens to your friend? Bystander fear and the limits of intervention
08:39 - Friends, fear, and the complexities of staying silent
10:26 - How abusers choose and control: tactics, patterns, and courtroom manipulation
11:02 - Real-time: Diddy’s behavior with the judge and jury—more manipulation revealed
12:55 - Moving to “Jane’s” testimony and the anatomy of long-term abuse
13:36 - The psychology of love bombing and being drawn in
14:37 - The progressive trap: from excitement to entrapment

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