Clear+Vivid with Alan Alda
David Brooks: How to Know a Person
Nov 21, 2023
David Brooks, columnist and author, shares insights on truly knowing people, including the importance of storytelling conversations, genuine curiosity, and the role of community weavers in building connections. They also discuss the transformative power of personal growth and the significance of small talk in fostering trust and understanding.
42:50
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Quick takeaways
- Being an illuminator in communication involves being genuinely curious about others and making them feel valued.
- Empathy in effective communication involves mirroring, mentalizing, and caring, and can be enhanced by being a loud listener and embracing pauses.
Deep dives
The Power of Illuminators and Diminishers in Communication
In this podcast episode, David Brooks discusses the concept of illuminators and diminishers in communication. Diminishers are not curious about others and often stereotype and label people. They engage in a behavior called stacking, assuming they know everything about a person based on a single piece of information. On the other hand, illuminators are genuinely interested in others, eager to know their backstory and make them feel valued. Brooks emphasizes the importance of being an illuminator and fostering genuine curiosity in our interactions.
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