Start with Small Steps 222 - The Two Buckets: A Simple Way to Solve Life’s Problems
222 - The Two Buckets: A Simple Way to Solve Life’s Problems
Hi everyone, it’s Jill from the North Woods! In this episode, I’m sharing one of the biggest life lessons I ever learned—the concept of putting problems into two buckets: things I can change and things I cannot. This idea, rooted in the Serenity Prayer, has helped me navigate everything from growing up with an alcoholic parent to financial struggles, career changes, and even weight loss.
I’ll take you through the history of this powerful mindset, from ancient Greek philosophers to modern problem-solving techniques, and share real-life examples of how shifting my focus has made all the difference. If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of how to tackle life’s challenges, this episode is for you.
The Serenity Prayer and How It Shaped My Thinking
I first learned the Serenity Prayer in my teens while attending Alateen, a support group for children of alcoholics. This simple yet profound message helped me reframe my struggles, allowing me to focus on what I could change instead of feeling powerless over what I couldn’t.
The Long History of This Wisdom
The idea of separating problems into what’s within our control and what isn’t has been around for centuries. I share insights from historical figures like Epictetus, Solomon ibn Gabirol, and Shantideva, all of whom recognized the power of focusing on what we can control.
Real-Life Applications of the Two Buckets Approach
-Growing Up with an Alcoholic Parent – I couldn’t stop my dad from drinking, but I could create a full, active life outside of that challenge.
-Politics & Global Issues – I can’t change everything, but I can vote, volunteer, and contribute where I can.
-Financial Stability & Retirement Worries – Social Security’s future is uncertain, but I can prepare by saving more and making smart financial decisions.
-Weight Loss & Health – I once thought my weight was out of my control until I found new solutions and the right support.
Re-Evaluating What’s in Your “Can’t Change” Bucket
Sometimes, we assume a problem is out of our hands when it’s really not. I share examples of creative problem-solving—like how a simple change (adding mirrors) made people stop complaining about slow elevators. The key is to step back, get a new perspective, and challenge assumptions.
Takeaways:
✅ Put problems into two buckets: Can you change it or not?
✅ Focus on action instead of worrying about things beyond your control.
✅ Re-evaluate your buckets over time—something that seemed unchangeable might have a solution you haven’t seen yet.
✅ Seek outside advice when you feel stuck—sometimes an expert or a fresh perspective can make all the difference.
✅ If something is in the "can change" bucket, take the first step today.
This mindset shift has helped me reduce stress and solve problems more effectively, and I hope it helps you too. Now, I challenge you—think about a problem in your life right now. Which bucket does it belong in?
Let me know what you think! Email me at Jill@startwithsmallsteps.com, comment on my channel, or share this episode with someone who might need it. Thanks for listening, and have a great week!
https://startwithsmallsteps.com/the-two-buckets-a-simple-way-to-solve-lifes-problems/
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Email the podcast at jill@startwithsmallsteps.com