ERP 512: The Courage Practice: How Facing Fear Deepens Intimacy and Connection — An Interview with Scott Simon

What if playing it safe is actually keeping you from the life and relationships you truly want? Too often, fear convinces us to stay small, avoid discomfort, and stick to familiar routines, especially when it comes to our most important connections. The result? Missed opportunities for deep intimacy, vibrant trust, and authentic connection. It's a paradox: the very quest for comfort may be the greatest risk of all.

In this episode, listeners are invited to challenge the idea that comfort equals happiness. Through inspiring stories and practical tools, the conversation explores how embracing courage, even in small, everyday ways, can lead to deeper, more meaningful relationships. Discover why facing fears (rather than running from them) is essential for personal growth and intimacy, and how a simple courage practice can transform both self-perception and connection with loved ones. Whether it's starting an uncomfortable conversation or supporting each other through life's uncertainties, this episode offers actionable steps to help anyone move from fear to flourishing in their relationships.

Scott Simon is a thought leader, TEDx speaker, bestselling author, and founder of the Scare Your Soul movement, helping people transform their lives through small daily acts of courage. He's worked with the UN, Nestlé, Ritz Carlton, Logitech, and the Cleveland Clinic to build braver teams and more connected cultures. When he's not leading keynotes or designing transformative retreats, you'll find Scott chasing live music, journaling in strange airports, or hunting down the world's best hole-in-the-wall restaurants.

Episode Highlights

04:24 Overcoming the tendency to shrink back and building momentum through bravery and courage.

09:20 How embracing discomfort leads to growth and creativity.

16:16 How small actions outside your comfort zone can build courage and lead to transformative outcomes.

20:08 Challenging relationship norms for deeper bonds.

28:47 Unlocking authenticity through vulnerability in relationships.

32:10 Aligning courageous choices with core values in relationships.

35:30 Personal examples of standing in your truth.

39:56 Practicing self-awareness and micro acts of courage for relational growth.

Your Checklist of Actions to Take

• Start a daily courage practice: Each day, do one small thing that scares you or takes you out of your comfort zone, just as the guest recommends.

• Pause and check in with yourself: Before difficult conversations, take a moment to breathe deeply and center yourself, allowing self-awareness to guide your next steps.

• Reflect on your core values: Use your values as a filter when deciding which courageous actions to take in your relationships.

• Initiate honest conversations: If you're holding back something important, practice being the one to "go first" and share vulnerably, even if it feels risky.

• Name your feelings in real-time: During tough moments, state what you're experiencing physically or emotionally (e.g., "My heart is racing right now"), to foster connection and authenticity.

• Seek support for brave actions: Engage a partner or friend to do something courageous together, which can increase commitment and make the experience richer.

• Replace silence with authentic sharing: Consider what keeping quiet is truly serving, and choose to communicate openly instead of bottling things up.

• Practice small acts of kindness: Try courage-building social acts, like initiating a friendly conversation or buying someone a coffee, to strengthen your confidence and connectedness.

Mentioned

Scare Your Soul (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book)

David Schnarch (*Wikipedia link)

Conscious Loving (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book)

12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free guide)

Connect with Scott Simon

Websites: scottsimon.us | scareyoursoul.com

Instagram: instagram.com/scareyoursoul

Substack: scareyoursoul.substack.com