

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide
Dr. Jessica Higgins
The Empowered Relationship Podcast helps you turn relationship challenges into opportunities and sets you up for relationship success, satisfaction, and intimacy.
This podcast is designed to inspire, motivate, and guide individuals and couples into more empowered, conscious, and evolved ways of loving.
This podcast is designed to inspire, motivate, and guide individuals and couples into more empowered, conscious, and evolved ways of loving.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Dec 9, 2025 • 49min
ERP 506: Regulate Your Body, Transform Your Bond: The Habit Science Behind Healthy Love — An Interview with Hadlee Garrison
Ever feel like your to-do list is running your life and you barely have any energy left for what matters most—like connecting with loved ones or just enjoying the moment? In our fast-paced world, we often believe productivity comes from pushing ourselves harder, burning the candle at both ends, and tackling more tasks. But what if the key to a happier, healthier life starts before you even get to your goals and conversations—right in the foundation of your daily rhythms and body awareness? In this episode, you'll discover why tuning into your body's core needs is the missing link for emotional safety, deeper relationships, and true productivity. The conversation unveils science-backed strategies and ancient wisdom to help you manage your energy, regulate your nervous system, and build habits that become second nature. You'll also explore personalized approaches to self-care—so you can stop the cycle of burnout and perfectionism, cultivate more resilience, and create space for meaningful connections every day. Hadlee Garrison, MPH, is a holistic Health Counselor, behavior change expert, podcaster, and speaker. She's the creator of the Happy Healthy Habits coaching program, where she helps women optimize their energy levels, regulate their nervous systems, and heal their relationship with their bodies and themselves. With degrees in Biopsychology and Health Education from the University of Michigan, as well as training in Ayurveda, Hadlee blends evidence-based science with holistic modalities to help her clients thrive. Episode Highlights 04:43 Struggling with body image, emotional eating, and disconnection in early life. 08:40 Discovering Ayurveda and mind-body practices for emotional safety. 12:32 The link between nervous system capacity and relationship conflict. 13:52 Building foundational health habits: Circadian rhythms, sleep, and energy management. 19:27 Prioritizing consistent bedtime for optimal health. 20:35 How personal health habits impact relationship dynamics. 26:22 Energy archetypes: Understanding personal stress patterns. 34:49 Taking small steps and automating self-care habits. 41:39 Oil massage and physical self-love practices for nervous system regulation. 44:13 Resources for discovering your energy archetype and connecting with Hadlee. Your Checklist of Actions to Take Prioritize consistent sleep: Go to bed at the same time every night to support healthy circadian rhythms and overall well-being. Establish a simple morning routine: Create morning habits that energize you—this doesn't mean a lengthy ritual, but something that helps you feel awake and grounded. Identify your energy drains and boosters: Pay attention to which tasks or activities drain your energy and which ones replenish it, adjusting your schedule accordingly. Automate foundational habits: Focus on making your basic self-care and wellness routines so automatic that they require little mental energy to maintain. Start small with new habits: If you're building a new habit, begin with manageable baby steps to ensure consistency and avoid burnout or overwhelm. Incorporate nervous system regulation: After foundational habits are in place, introduce practices like breathwork or somatic exercises, but only as needed—not all day, every day. Ask for support from your partner: Communicate with your partner about what helps you regulate—this might be a gentle touch, a walk together, or another soothing gesture during conflict. Customize your self-care: Recognize your personal energy archetype and tailor your wellness strategies—whether you need more grounding, invigoration, or soothing—based on your unique tendencies. Mentioned Energy Archetype Quiz (link) (quiz) 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free guide) Connect with Hadlee Garrison Websites: happyhealthyhadlee.com YouTube: youtube.com/@happyhealthyhadlee Instagram: instagram.com/happyhealthyhadlee TikTok: tiktok.com/@happyhealthyhadlee Podcast: Spotify: https://bit.ly/4iGbHZN | Apple Podcast: https://bit.ly/4iHvBDG

Dec 2, 2025 • 44min
ERP 505: Money Wounds in Love: Healing the Hidden Stories Behind Your Spending and Saving — An Interview with Shari Rash
When was the last time you felt a sinking feeling just thinking about money? For many, money is far more than just numbers in a bank account—it's tangled up with our emotions, childhood experiences, and even our closest relationships. All too often, conversations around money get swept under the rug, leaving us to battle our financial stress and shame alone. But what if unraveling these hidden money wounds is the key to building stronger connections—with ourselves and with others? In this episode, listeners are invited to reimagine their relationship with money and begin addressing the emotional baggage attached to it. Through relatable stories and practical examples, this conversation explores how early money memories shape our beliefs and behaviors, and impact how we communicate with partners, friends, and even our kids. You'll learn actionable steps to identify your own "money story," bridge differences in financial perspectives, and move from feelings of shame or avoidance to a place of security and mutual understanding. If you're ready to make money a tool for connection rather than conflict, this episode offers a roadmap for transforming anxiety into empowerment. Shari Rash is a nationally recognized financial advisor, money mindset expert, and the host of Everyone's Talkin' Money—named a Top 4 money podcast by The New York Times, with over 24 million downloads. Shari breaks down complex financial topics into real-life conversations that empower women to own their worth and build lasting wealth. She's been named a 2024 Best Wealth Manager and Advisor Under 40 by InvestmentNews. Episode Highlights 04:40 How sharing money struggles brings us closer. 07:59 Understanding money personalities in romantic relationships. 10:08 Unpacking money conflicts: Addressing deeper needs in couples. 13:58 Creating compromises and shared financial goals in partnership. 17:20 Exploring childhood money memories and their lasting impact. 22:36 Real couple example: Money stories shaping habits and choices. 24:51 Turning financial difficulties into relationship growth. 26:57 The healing power of monthly money conversations. 31:28 Moving from money shame to practical, empowered choices. 38:26 Making spending intentional and aligning with values. 41:47 Reflection questions to deepen your money relationships. Your Checklist of Actions to Take Reflect on your earliest money memory to uncover potential beliefs and wounds about finances. Initiate regular, open conversations about money with your partner or friends without sharing private details. Identify your and your partner's "money personality" (saver, spender, hoarder, YOLO) to better understand differences in financial habits. Practice vulnerability by sharing concerns or challenges related to money to strengthen intimacy and support. Set a realistic number that feels comfortable for your checking account and use it as your "zero" baseline. Build an emergency fund by calculating three to six months of expenses and agreeing on the right amount for your household. Align spending habits with your core values and make intentional choices that reflect what matters most to you. Create structured, positive money check-ins with your partner, starting each meeting with wins or appreciations to foster connection. Mentioned 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free guide) Connect with Shari Rash Websites: everyonestalkinmoneypodcast.com | gwawealth.com X: x.com/MoneyChicShari YouTube: youtube.com/@EveryonesTalkinMoney Instagram: instagram.com/everyonestalkinmoney LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/shari-rash

Nov 25, 2025 • 48min
ERP 504: Loving Through Estrangement: How Couples Can Heal, Support & Stay Connected — An Interview with Dr. Rachel Glik
Navigating the complexities of family dynamics can sometimes feel like walking a tightrope—especially when relationships between parents and adult children become strained or even break down completely. Family estrangement is an increasingly common challenge that can leave everyone involved feeling isolated, misunderstood, and in deep pain. When communication falters and generational differences collide, how do we find a path toward empathy, healing, and growth? In this episode, listeners are invited into a heartfelt exploration of adult child-parent estrangement, its underlying causes, and the impact it has on both individuals and entire families. The conversation offers practical insights on healing old wounds, understanding the spiritual and psychological dynamics at play, and tools for fostering compassion—even when distance or conflict seems insurmountable. With stories, expert reflections, and actionable guidance, this discussion aims to support anyone facing the difficult terrain of family disconnection, offering hope and concrete steps toward greater understanding and unity. Dr. Rachel Glik is a licensed professional counselor with 30+ years as a couples, individual and family therapist in private practice. Since 2014, she has been a regular feature on the Fox 2 AM show in St. Louis as a relationship and mental health expert. Rachel appeared on NBC News Daily at the launch of her book, A Soulful Marriage: Healing Your Relationship with Responsibility, Growth, Priority, and Purpose. She is a writer for The Wall Street Journal, CNBC Make It, Psychology Today, and MindBodyGreen. Rachel teaches and gives seminars for organizations such as The Kabbalah Centre and Young Presidents Organization (YPO). She lives in St. Louis with her husband and large extended family. Episode Highlights 03:40 Exploring why parent–child estrangement is becoming more common. 09:04 Considering how distance can sometimes support healing and growth. 12:35 The power of early repair before patterns set in. 15:03 Understanding the emotional complexity of parenting adult children. 16:31 Shifting into a new parental role as boundaries and autonomy evolve. 21:35 Recognizing the grief and self-validation needed as relationships change. 24:26 Reflecting on how to hold a compassionate space for an adult child's experience. 26:09 Learning to move beyond defensiveness and listen with openness. 29:38 Embracing generational differences with curiosity rather than fear. 32:56 Navigating how estrangement affects couples and their parenting alignment. 37:56 Prioritizing self-compassion in the midst of relational hardship. 40:43 Practicing accountability and authentic repair within the family and partnership. Your Check List of Actions to Take Take a moment to ground yourself with a deep breath before engaging in challenging family conversations to increase presence and calm. When tension arises, reflect honestly on how your actions may contribute, and express accountability to foster trust and safety. Aim to respond with supportive, non-judgmental language, empowering your adult child to make their own decisions. Listen deeply to your child's experiences and feelings, holding space for their emotions without jumping into explanations or defense. Find the balance between support and over-giving, maintain your wellbeing, and be mindful of your energy. Ask permission before sharing concerns or advice, acknowledging you're entering your adult child's "lane." Recognize the pain and complexity of estrangement, and give yourself grace throughout the healing process. Reach out for therapy, coaching, or resources to receive guidance in navigating family estrangement and building new communication strategies. Mentioned A Soulful Marriage (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Family Constellations (*Wikipedia link) Passionate Marriage (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Kabbalah (*Wikipedia link) ERP 473: How to Experience More Embodied Pleasure Sexually – An Interview with Susan Taylor 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free guide) Connect with Dr. Rachel Glik Websites: drrachelglik.com Facebook: facebook.com/p/Dr-Rachel-Glik-EdD-LPC-100027702446361 Instagram: instagram.com/drrachelglik LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dr-rachel-glik-edd-lpc-a7047ab Pinterest: pinterest.com/drrachelglik

Nov 19, 2025 • 46min
503: How to Feel Safe in Love: Healing Attachment Wounds and Building Secure Relationships — An Interview with Jessica Baum
Many of us move through life repeating the same painful relationship patterns—feeling unsafe, unseen, or disconnected, even when we're trying our hardest to "do everything right." Invisible wounds from early experiences quietly shape the ways we love, cope, and relate as adults. Instead of recognizing these patterns as natural adaptations, we often turn the blame inward, not realizing that our attachment styles and protective behaviors are rooted in the body and nervous system as much as the mind. Real healing isn't about forcing change or consuming endless self-help advice—it's about reshaping your internal sense of safety on a deeply felt, embodied level. In this episode, we explore how secure, nourishing relationships begin with understanding the implicit memories, sensations, and patterns that live inside us. Learn how to meet old wounds with compassion, honor the protective parts that once kept you safe, and gently build new internal anchors of stability and trust. Using tools like the Wheel of Attachment and the practice of "finding your anchors," this episode offers both a clear roadmap and grounded encouragement for anyone ready to move beyond survival mode and experience connection that feels authentic, spacious, and truly supportive. Jessica Baum is a licensed psychotherapist, certified addiction specialist, and Imago couples therapist with advanced training in EMDR, CBT, DBT, and experiential therapy. She founded the Relationship Institute of Palm Beach and leads a global coaching company supporting clients worldwide. Passionate about trauma, attachment, and interpersonal neurobiology, Jessica helps individuals and couples heal and reconnect. Her bestselling book, Anxiously Attached, has made her a respected voice in nurturing secure, fulfilling relationships. Episode Highlights 05:55 How early experiences shape our sense of safety. 07:48 Implicit memories and relationship patterns. 11:09 The importance of somatic (body-based) memory. 13:14 Reconnecting with the body for healing. 18:42 Understanding and honoring protective behaviors. 21:40 Building trust in healthier relationship dynamics. 25:00 The essential role of anchors in healing. 26:06 Why healing requires relationships, not willpower. 31:43 Finding and cultivating emotional anchors. 35:05 The Wheel of Attachment: A nuanced approach. 37:45 Earning security through supportive experiences. 40:31 Moving toward fulfillment: Real connection and support. Your Check List of Actions to Take Slow down and take mindful pauses to help connect with your body and increase present-moment awareness. Notice physical sensations during interactions, especially in moments of emotional intensity, to access implicit memories and attachment wounds. Practice developing interoception—your ability to sense internal bodily states—to better understand your emotional responses in relationships. Identify and honor your protective patterns ("protectors") rather than judging them; acknowledge they were there to support you. Seek out safe "anchors" or individuals who can offer emotional co-regulation and support your healing process. Use the "Wheel of Attachment" framework to explore how your early relational dynamics show up in current relationships. If you lack supportive anchors, resource from memories of secure figures (e.g., a teacher, grandparent) or pursue professional support. Engage in relationships and healing spaces where vulnerability, witnessing, and somatic attunement are encouraged, facilitating earned secure attachment over time. Mentioned Safe: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building More Secure Relationships Anxiously Attached: Becoming More Secure in Life and Love SAFE (Interview and freebies link) Nurturing the Heart (Dr. Bonnie Badenoch's website) Conscious Relationship Group (Facebook group) (link) Relationship Institute of Palm Beach ERP 342: How Love Transforms Our Nervous System — An Interview With Jessica Baum ERP 276: Understanding The Need For Both Self-Regulation And Co-Regulation In Relationship – An interview With Deb Dana ERP 261: How To Strengthen Your Relationship From A Polyvagal Perspective – An Interview with Dr. Stephen Porges ERP 423: How To Transcend Trauma (And The Effects Experience In Relationship) — An Interview With Dr. Frank Anderson 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free guide) Connect with Jessica Baum Websites: beselffull.com Facebook: facebook.com/consciousrelationshipgroup YouTube: youtube.com/@jessicabaumlmhc Instagram: instagram.com/jessicabaumlmhc

Nov 12, 2025 • 45min
ERP 502: Beyond Fear and Control: Building Emotional Flexibility in Relationships — An Interview with Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona
Are you letting anxiety and the need to play it safe hold you hostage in your relationships and personal growth? Too often, fear—of rejection, failure, or the unknown—becomes the invisible fence shaping our actions. Perfectionism, procrastination, overthinking, and the constant urge to avoid discomfort can shrink our lives, leaving us disconnected from our true selves and the people we care about most. In this episode, we explore how fear influences perfectionism, anxiety, and avoidance in our relationships and daily lives. Discover compassionate approaches to working with anxiety—learning why fighting it doesn't work, and how, instead, our willingness to acknowledge, understand, and even befriend discomfort can become a gateway to deeper connection and greater freedom. Through practical tools and real-world strategies like "uncertainty workouts," values-based action, and self-compassion, this episode aims to help you navigate the messy, beautiful process of showing up more authentically for yourself and those you care about. Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona is on a mission to help people break free from ineffective, play-it-safe patterns so they can begin living rich, purposeful, and meaningful lives. A trained psychologist, she is the author of seven books and co-author of two more. Her expertise has led her to present workshops at both national and international conferences. She also runs a boutique therapy and coaching practice that specializes in the application of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) for anxiety. Passionate about her work, she delights in creating personalized resources for every client she serves. Episode Highlights 06:03 The interconnectedness of anxiety and its impact on life. 09:07 The importance of accepting anxiety instead of fighting it. 10:02 Using values to guide responses and reduce anxiety's control. 13:50 The need to tolerate discomfort in relationships. 18:53 Navigating fear of commitment and embracing uncertainty. 22:49 Building tolerance for ambiguity and uncertainty. 24:32 How avoiding uncomfortable emotions can increase suffering and relates to trauma and emotional regulation. 29:52 Values-based exposure and compassionate approaches to fear. 33:41 Developing micro skills for managing difficult conversations. 35:41 Integrating self-compassion and Wise Moves for anxiety management. 38:01 Practical resources, parenting insights, and closing reflections. Your Check List of Actions to Take Take a moment to pause with a deep inhale and exhale, noticing sensations in your body before engaging in difficult conversations or when feeling anxious. Instead of fighting anxiety, recognize it as a protective part of your humanity and make room for it. When anxiety arises, ask yourself what truly matters to you in that moment to guide your response. Embrace uncomfortable feelings in relationships without avoidance, viewing them as essential for growth and authenticity. Intentionally expose yourself to uncertainty in small, manageable ways (like trying a new restaurant or activity) to build tolerance. When fear surfaces, actively choose actions that align with your core values—even if they feel difficult. Treat yourself with gentleness during moments of avoidance, procrastination, or anxiety, recognizing your effort and courage. When facing a fearful situation, pause and check in with your body and thoughts, then proceed with intentionality rather than rushing through. Mentioned The ACT Workbook for Teens with OCD (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Living Beyond OCD Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Escaping the Emotional Roller Coaster (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Parenting a Troubled Teen (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Acceptance and Commitment Skills for Perfectionism and High-Achieving Behaviors (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) The ACT Workbook for the Anxious Procrastinator (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Dr. Z's Online Classes (link) ERP 461: How to Increase Psychological Flexibility for Healthy Relationships — An Interview with Dr. Steven Hayes ERP 238: How To Find Your Emotional Balance In Relationship 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free relationship guide) (pdf) Connect with Dr. Patricia Zurita Ona Websites: thisisdoctorz.com | eastbaybehaviortherapycenter.com Facebook: facebook.com/EastBayBehaviorTherapyCenter | facebook.com/Dr-Z-102029237841421 X: twitter.com/DrZ_behaviorist YouTube: linkedin.com/in/patricia-e-zurita-ona-psy-d-949b5a15 Instagram: instagram.com/dr.z.passionatebehaviorist

Nov 4, 2025 • 45min
ERP 501: From Projection to Presence: The Art of Seeing and Being Seen — An Interview With David Mars
Feeling unseen and misunderstood in your closest relationship can be one of the loneliest experiences, even when surrounded by family and friends. It's not uncommon for couples to fall into patterns of projection, reactivity, and defensiveness, leaving genuine intimacy and deep connection feeling just out of reach. How do we move from these cycles of blame and distance towards the kind of secure, transformative partnership that brings true accompaniment, dignity, and joy? In this episode, you are invited to slow down and explore new pathways to presence and connection. Through practical tools, guided reflection, and insights rooted in transformative couples therapy, you'll discover ways to move beyond automatic reactivity and habitual defense, and instead cultivate curiosity, somatic awareness, and genuine intimacy. Whether you're looking to strengthen trust, improve communication, or rekindle the spark in a long-term bond, this conversation offers powerful guidance for anyone seeking more clarity, care, and lasting growth in their relationships. Since 2008 Dr. David Mars has been the developer of Transformative Couples Therapy® (TCT). He leads seminars and training programs internationally on TCT. Affective neuroscience and attachment research are central to this experiential, somatically attuned and positivity-based method. Currently Dr. Mars also is the leader of a three-year project to quantify the results of TCT in preparation to offer published research on outcomes of the method. He is the Director of the Transformative Couples Therapy® Institute. Episode Highlights 03:39 The impact of curiosity and projections in long-term relationships. 08:32 How attachment styles form early in life and opportunities for change. 10:05 The importance of somatic awareness, attunement, and slowing down in relationships. 15:42 Gender, stress, and the emotional costs of disconnection. 17:48 Strategies for setting boundaries and cultivating safe communication. 23:14 Transformation and growth through the I-Thou relationship. 24:43 Daily practices and the seven channels of experience in couples therapy. 29:49 Awareness of energetic imprints and somatic patterns from early life. 31:15 Navigating and embracing partner differences in relationships. 34:43 The role of journaling, self-regulation, and reverence in relational health. 40:57 Somatic-based modalities, resources, and generativity in relationships. Your Check List of Actions to Take Begin your conversations or sessions with your partner by sharing something you appreciate about each other to set a positive tone. Take a deep inhale and exhale together to ground yourselves and invite presence before important discussions. Communicate your feelings and needs using "I" statements to promote vulnerability and reduce defensiveness. Speak directly to your partner, not just about them or through a third party, to foster genuine connection. Notice and share your body sensations (like a tight chest or warm hands) during emotional exchanges to heighten self-awareness and attunement. Approach your partner with genuine curiosity and try to witness their experience, rather than making assumptions or projecting your own perspective. If either partner feels overwhelmed or unresourced, honor the need to pause and agree on a time to revisit the conversation. Tune into the seven channels—sensation, emotion, energy, movement, auditory, visual, and imaginal—to enrich both your self-awareness and your communication with your partner. Mentioned Martin Buber (Britannica link) (biography) I-Thou (*Britannica link) The I-Thou Relationship and Unconditional Positive Regard (*Psychology Today) Carl Rogers (*Wikipedia link) (article) The 1957 Martin Buber-Carl Rogers Dialogue, as Dialogue (*Sage Journals) (study) Beatrice Beebe (*Wikipedia link) (article) *John Bowlby (*Wikipedia link) (article) *John Beebe (*Wikipedia link) (article) 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free relationship guide) (pdf) Connect with David Mars Websites: tctinstitute.org Facebook: facebook.com/p/Center-for-Transformative-Therapy-100087943999843 Instagram: instagram.com/transformativecouplestherapy/ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/transformative-couples-therapy

Oct 28, 2025 • 47min
ERP 500: The Practice of Us: Living the Skills That Keep Love Alive
This episode marks an incredible milestone—the 500th episode of the Empowered Relationship Podcast. To celebrate, Dr. Jessica Higgins and her husband, Reid Peterson, sit down for a heartfelt and revealing conversation about what it really takes to cultivate a truly empowered partnership. If you've ever wondered why, despite your best intentions, emotional honesty and vulnerability can feel so risky—or why differences and conflict so often create distance instead of closeness—you're not alone. The path to authentic connection is filled with challenges that test even the strongest relationships. In this special episode, Jessica and Reid open up about the principles and practices that have helped them build a foundation of trust, love, and growth throughout their years together. They share personal stories, practical strategies, and honest reflections on navigating tough conversations, supporting each other's emotional needs, and finding clarity in uncertain times. Whether you're learning to handle conflict, embrace vulnerability, or co-create a meaningful vision for your life together, you'll discover insights and tools to transform relationship challenges into opportunities for deeper connection and lasting love. Episode Highlights 04:58 Building safety and trust through honesty in partnership. 09:15 Jessica shares how vulnerability early in dating deepened their intimacy. 11:47 How honest conversations help reduce shame and strengthen connection. 14:11 How different personalities shape communication in relationships. 19:52 Strategies to navigate conflict with calm and empathy. 35:51 Building clarity, connection, and purpose through joint visioning. 44:08 Strengthening relationships through further exploration and resources. Your Check List of Actions to Take Practice speaking honestly about your core feelings, emotions, and needs—even when it feels risky or uncomfortable. Pause during moments of tension to take a few deep breaths, center yourself, and check in with what you're feeling before responding. When conflict arises, communicate the need for space calmly and agree on a time to revisit the discussion to avoid sweeping issues under the rug. Seek reassurance or a quick check-in from your partner during periods of disconnection to help reduce anxiety and foster trust. Cultivate attuned listening—focus on truly understanding what your partner is expressing beyond the words, and ask clarifying questions when needed. Name whether you're seeking comfort or solutions in conversations, so your partner knows how best to support you. Regularly engage in shared visioning exercises together to clarify mutual values and dreams, and support each other in the process—even when values differ. Download and use the "12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love" guide to gain clarity and practical strategies for your relationship. Mentioned 12 Relationship Principles to Strengthen Your Love (free relationship guide) (pdf) Relational Health Assessment (quiz)

Oct 21, 2025 • 47min
ERP 499: Regulate to Relate: Building Embodied Safety in Love — An Interview with Aubrey Aust
Ever feel like you know all the "right" things to do in a relationship, but when the moment comes, your body is flooded with stress, your voice tightens, or you just shut down? Many of us long for deep connection and trust, but when life gets real, our nervous system can hijack our best intentions. The invisible forces of old wounds, protective patterns, and the lightning-fast reactions of our bodies can make true safety in love feel just out of reach. In this episode, you'll discover practical ways to bridge the gap between knowing and feeling safe and connected with your partner. Drawing on insights from attachment and polyvagal theory, somatic psychology, and real-world relationship experiences, the conversation sheds light on what "embodied safety" truly means—and why it's the foundation for intimacy, trust, and even passion. Listeners will come away with tools to notice their body's cues, co-regulate with a partner, and develop relational intelligence that supports lasting, resilient love—even when challenges arise. Aubrey Aust is a writer and master's candidate at NYU studying relational psychology and philosophy. Her work explores how emotional safety, embodiment, and relational intelligence shape intimacy and trust. Drawing from attachment theory, polyvagal theory, and somatic psychology, Aubrey helps individuals and couples understand how to build safety in relationships through both the mind and the body. She is passionate about making complex psychological insights practical, soulful, and deeply human. Episode Highlights 08:38 How our bodies subconsciously sense safety or danger in relationships. 10:32 The importance of nonverbal cues and body sensations in emotional communication. 16:50 Identifying and changing self-protective behaviors that block intimacy. 19:10 Accessing vulnerability for co-regulation. 21:54 How consistency shapes true relational growth. 26:32 Navigating the tension between meeting others' needs and self-care in daily life. 28:08 How curiosity about intense emotions can help heal shame and estrangement. 32:04 How understanding core needs brings freedom and new options in relationships. 35:17 Rewiring your reactions: How noticing your nervous system transforms relationships. 38:39 How small shifts in attention can instantly calm your nervous system. 41:30 Unlocking the power to heal and evolve through relationship challenges. Your Check List of Actions to Take Take conscious pauses to slow down and deepen your breath, helping you regulate stress and become more present in relationships. Practice tuning into your bodily sensations during interactions—notice tension, breath patterns, or relaxation—to better understand your felt sense of safety. Build somatic awareness by gently observing your physical reactions when you feel unsafe or activated, such as tightness, speeding up, or shutting down. Create check-in rituals with your partner to attune to each other's nervous system cues, like noticing changes in body language, tone, or energy. Normalize and expect moments of rupture or conflict, and view them as opportunities to build relational trust through repair and open communication. Get curious about your protective patterns (such as people-pleasing, avoidance, or hyper-independence) and consider when they may no longer serve intimacy. Use subtle self-regulation techniques in social situations, like grounding your feet, gently pressing your fingers together, or scanning the room to calm your nervous system. When you feel dysregulated in a conversation, ask clarifying questions or take a brief pause to gather yourself instead of reacting from a place of activation. Mentioned It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Social Baseline Theory (National Library of Medicine article) Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) (Psychology Today) Polyvegal Theory (Polyvagal Institute) ERP 261: How To Strengthen Your Relationship From A Polyvagal Perspective – An Interview with Dr. Stephen Porges ERP 276: Understanding The Need For Both Self-Regulation And Co-Regulation In Relationship – An interview With Deb Dana Evolve in Love (program) Evolve In Love Discovery Session with Dr. Jessica Higgins (Acuity booking link) Connect with Aubrey Aust Websites: aubreyaust.com YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCozW2k08GkMQbjs1vyN_Fkw Instagram: www.instagram.com/aubrey__aust LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/aubrey-aust-8b7744174 Newsletter: aubreyaust.com/newsletter

Oct 14, 2025 • 47min
ERP 498: Turn Toward, Turn On: How Couples Grow Desire (Not Just Talk About It) — An Interview with Dr. Diane Mueller
Why is it that talking about desire and intimacy with your partner can feel more intimidating than any other conversation in a relationship, even when you've shared years—or decades—together? So many couples silently struggle with mismatched libido, lost spark, or simply the discomfort of broaching sensitive topics about sex and pleasure. When left unspoken, these issues have the power to erode connection and joy in long-term relationships. If you've ever wondered why desire seems to fade, or why candid discussions about passion feel off-limits, you're not alone. In this episode, listeners are invited to explore how couples can move beyond just talking about desire and actually grow it together. Through stories, scientific insights, and actionable strategies, the conversation unpacks the barriers to open communication about sexuality—from shame and defensiveness to the physical and emotional roots of low libido. Along the way, listeners will learn how to build safety, cultivate presence, and consciously turn toward intimacy, laying the foundation for a relationship that's vibrant, resilient, and full of authentic connection. Whether you're seeking new energy with your partner or looking for tools to nurture your own sexual self-awareness, this episode is packed with practical guidance to help you rediscover your spark—together. Dr. Diane Mueller, ND, DAOM, is a board certified sexologist with dual doctorates in Naturopathic as well as Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine. She is the founder of the sex education center: MyLibidoDoc.com and hosts 'The Libido Lounge' podcast, where she helps monogamous couples create more passion, desire, hotter sex and better communication. Episode Highlights 06:23 Dr. Diane Mueller's journey from healing vulvar pain to embracing sexual wellness. 07:48 Navigating relationship styles and lessons learned from open relationships in the pursuit of lasting passion. 10:34 The importance of open sexual communication and overcoming shame in relationships. 16:27 Building a foundation of safety and how positive feedback strengthens sexual communication. 25:24 Presence and pleasure, and the mindfulness connection for enhancing sexual experience. 30:13 Embracing emotions in sexuality, including the role of anger and emotional expression in intimacy. 36:12 Identifying dissociation and cultivating presence to deepen sexual experience. 37:47 Harnessing sex for healing by using altered states and partner practices for growth. 41:36 Personal growth and relationship success with reflections on healing, compatibility, and lasting love. Your Check List of Actions to Take Start open and honest conversations about sex and desire with your partner to reduce shame and taboo. Give specific, positive feedback after intimacy to build safety and connection. Clearly discuss and define your relationship agreements and boundaries together. Practice being present during intimate moments through mindful breathing or grounding exercises. Try a sensual touch practice, like giving each other foot massages, while focusing on sensation and awareness. Reflect on any personal beliefs or shame around sexuality and seek ways to address or release them. Take time to identify your own turn-ons and communicate these clearly to your partner. Use physical intimacy as an opportunity to process emotions, such as through movement, sound, or affirmations. Mentioned Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving (*Amazon Affiliate link) (book) Revive Your Love Life: 5 Easy Steps for MindBlowing Orgasms and Romance (link) (Free ebook) The Libido Quiz (quiz) YourUnique Sex Language (quiz) Libido Lounge (podcast) ERP 489: Flow State and Sexual Connection: A New Dimension of Intimacy — An Interview with Emily Jamea ERP 362: Understanding & Increasing Sexual Desire — An Interview with Dr. Lori Brotto Evolve in Love (program) Evolve In Love Discovery Session with Dr. Jessica Higgins (Acuity booking link) Connect with Dr. Diane Mueller Websites: mylibidodoc.com Facebook: facebook.com/groups/1678228482662878 YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCfWNwoCl4f4WMHpagB2KQsw Instagram: instagram.com/mylibidodoc

Oct 7, 2025 • 46min
ERP 497: Become the Family CEO: Build a 'Family Bank' and Lasting Wealth — An Interview with Lavaisha Davis
Have you ever faced a family crisis only to realize that financial instability adds an overwhelming weight to an already heavy moment? Or maybe you've felt isolated as the "first" in your family to reach new professional heights, only to discover no one handed you a playbook for building true generational wealth. Financial challenges don't just shake our wallets—they can ripple through our relationships, legacies, and even our sense of security and belonging. In this episode, listeners are invited to think beyond individual wealth and step into a bold new perspective: managing your family like a thriving enterprise. You'll discover why taking the role of "Family CEO" is not only possible but essential if you want to break cycles of financial insecurity and create a blueprint for lasting abundance. Through candid conversation and practical examples, this episode explores how intentional leadership, open communication, and collaborative vision-setting can empower you and those you love to build a family legacy that lasts. LaVaisha Davis is a wealth manager and advisor at Ell Wess Advisors, a firm offering family office solutions to founders, executives, and investors. She specializes in wealth-building, legacy planning, and asset protection—empowering clients to build financial independence and generational wealth. With a no-nonsense yet engaging style, she breaks down complex strategies like becoming your own bank. Her mission: to show people their family is their first enterprise—and should be managed like a business to build lasting wealth. Episode Highlights 05:42 Lavisha Davis recalls how family tragedy became a turning point for financial awareness. 08:53 How pain and loss inspired leadership and deeper financial responsibility. 12:03 What it means to be the family CEO: Mindset and misconceptions. 14:49 The challenges and opportunities of being the first financial trailblazer. 17:24 Crafting a shared family vision and values around wealth. 20:57 Running the family like a corporation: Structure, roles, and the family bank. 29:42 Understanding the risks and the need for transparency. 31:33 The cost of poor planning including inheritance, probate, and lost wealth. 37:13 Turning family strengths and structure into lasting wealth. 42:30 How to get started: Practical support and CEO training resources. Your Check List of Actions to Take Clarify your wealth vision by choosing whether to focus on personal financial security or building generational wealth. Adopt the Family CEO mindset and lead your household with intentional financial goals and strategies. Establish a family bank to manage shared resources as if you were running a business account. Have open money conversations to build trust, clarify roles, and reinforce shared commitments. Identify and leverage family strengths by assigning financial roles that align with each person's skills. Provide financial education for yourself and your family to make informed decisions and prepare future generations. Create a governance system with clear values, rules, and processes for collective decision-making. Take consistent action by turning plans into progress through small but steady financial steps. Mentioned Income to Wealth Masterclass (webinar registration link) Connect with Lavaisha Davis Websites: lavaishadavis.com Facebook: facebook.com/lavaisha.davis Instagram: instagram.com/lavaishadavis LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/lavaisha-davis-27094b208


