The Trouble with Sex

Cultivating the Space Where Your Relationship Lives

18 snips
Sep 19, 2025
Guest
Evie Shafner
Guest
Mary Kay Cocharo
Mary Kay Cocharo, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and Evie Shafner, an experienced clinical psychologist, dive into the dynamics of relationships. They discuss how anxiety and trauma can disrupt intimacy and suggest practical tools like intentional care for the 'space between' partners to nurture connection. The duo highlights the challenges younger generations face with communication and intimacy in a tech-saturated world, and they offer creative ways to enhance date nights and revitalize passion in relationships.
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INSIGHT

Space Between Partners Is The Relationship

  • The relationship lives in the space between partners and requires focused attention.
  • Therapists should be trained in relational paradigms to work with that inter-personal space.
ADVICE

Use Regulation Then Co-Regulate Together

  • Teach self-regulation tools like breathwork and mindfulness to lower reactivity.
  • Use co-regulation (eye contact, touch, rituals) to rebuild safety at home.
INSIGHT

Anxiety Kills Connection And Libido

  • Anxiety undermines both emotional connection and sexual desire.
  • Restoring connection is essential to heal anxiety and revive libido.
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