Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships 547 - Help! My Partner is Dating My Best Friend: Listener Q&A
Sep 16, 2025
This discussion dives into the emotional turmoil of a partner dating a close friend, unraveling feelings of insecurity and anxiety. There's an emphasis on trust and vulnerability while navigating complex romantic and platonic dynamics. The hosts share personal anecdotes about heartbreak in polyamorous relationships, highlighting the significance of self-awareness and effective communication. Listeners are encouraged to reflect on boundaries and emotional intricacies to maintain healthy dynamics among friends and partners.
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First Poly Heartbreak
- The questioner describes Hugo, a secondary partner, starting to date Claire, a close friend, and feeling immediate heartbreak.
- They wonder if they're failing at polyamory because this boundary felt like a dealbreaker.
Gut Boundaries Are Valid
- Dedeker highlights that intense emotions here can be valid and need not be pathologized or over-explained.
- She says it's okay to decide something just isn't workable for you without a brilliant justification.
Partner Asked Before Dating Friend
- Dedeker recounts a partner who wanted to date a friend and came to her before making any move, which she appreciated and supported.
- She liked that they sought her input and would have paused if she'd expressed discomfort.
