Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships 550 - We Still Play Medieval Dating Games
Oct 7, 2025
In this engaging discussion, Professor Annalisa Castaldo, an expert in medieval literature and human sexuality, delves into the bizarre world of 'The Art of Courtly Love.' She connects medieval courtship rituals to modern dating, exploring how concepts of romantic obsession and gender roles have deep historical roots. Annalisa highlights the stark contrast between duty-based marriage and the secretive, elective nature of courtly love, revealing troubling parallels to today's dating culture, including modern misogynistic movements like incels.
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Origins Of Courtly Love
- Courtly love arose in 12th-century European noble courts as ritualized games and legal-style courts of love.
- Eleanor of Aquitaine and her circle institutionalized rules that shaped later Western romance norms.
Love vs. Marriage Distinction
- Andreas Capellanus defined courtly love as an obsessive, often secret passion separate from marriage.
- He argued married couples can't experience this 'love' because marriage is contractual duty, not chosen longing.
Court Ruling On Broken Romantic Promise
- Annalisa recounts a court case where a knight expected a promised consolation after a woman married another.
- The queen ruled that love cannot exert power between husband and wife, so the promise expired.
