#118: Why Anxious & Avoidant People Are Drawn to Each Other

Why anxious and avoidant folks tend to be drawn to each other in relationships

Anxious and avoidant people often find themselves drawn to each other in relationships. This pattern is rooted in subconscious insecurities and belief systems. Anxious individuals, who fear abandonment and have low self-worth, are attracted to avoidant partners who may be less emotionally expressive and consistent. This dynamic reinforces their beliefs of working hard for love and feeling unworthy. On the other hand, avoidant individuals, who view relationships as hard work and believe others want too much from them, find the emotional expressiveness of anxious partners alluring. These attraction patterns stem from familiarity and the need to prove oneself right, even if the narratives are painful. Understanding these underlying dynamics can help individuals develop greater self-awareness and make more conscious choices in relationships.