EP 362: Is This Person Really the Love of Your Life, or is it an Issue-Based Relationship? With Rachel

Aug 17, 2022

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This episode is about getting the love we deserve. Today’s caller, Rachel, is in an issue-based relationship with a partner who doesn’t make her a priority. An issue-based relationship is when unresolved issues bring two people together. These relationships tend to be stressful, on-again-off-again, and come with anxiety, but the physical attraction is often very strong. Whether or not you are in a relationship you will get some gems from this episode.

[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode362]

Do you want the love of your life to be someone who causes you anxiety, who doesn’t make compromises for you, or who doesn’t make you a priority? Don’t you want better? We all deserve better than that. The problem is we get the love we think we deserve, not the love we actually deserve.

Many of us find ourselves in a position where we know something isn’t good for us. We know we want, and deserve better, but we just can’t let it go. It’s a form of addiction. It’s codependency. It is having our unmet needs tickled just enough that we go back for more. But, it’s not love. It’s not a true connection or partnership.

Something that can trip us up and make us suffer way more than we need to is when we have a rose-colored glasses tint on the way we see things. Because, when we do, we are more in love with an ideal than we are with the reality of things.

When we experience a love that is not based on unresolved issues, it makes us glad we left the relationships that were based on our issues. Love that comes from a healthy place is amazing!

If someone isn’t going out of their way to make you a priority, it is a red flag.

I’m happy to announce that my next Women’s Retreat will be held in Austin from October 7‒9, 2022. Go to ChristineHassler.com/signatureretreat or listen to my Coaches Corner with Jill to get more information about this life-changing opportunity. The early-bird registration promo ends on Sept. 1, 2022.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

Are you with someone you call the love of your life but they are more of a teacher or trigger in your life?
Are you aware your unresolved childhood issues and unmet needs could be influencing your relationship choices or the people you are attracted to?
Are you good at speaking up for your needs in relationships? Do you feel you always fight to get your needs met but it never happens?
Do you know you are in a relationship that isn’t good for you but you can’t seem to get out of it?

Rachel’s Question:

Rachel has an on-again-off-again relationship with someone she considers the love of her life and would like guidance on.

Rachel’s Key Insights and Ahas: