Love Life With Matthew Hussey Get Over “The One That Got Away” and Heal | Matt Monday
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Dec 15, 2025 Matthew Hussey and Jay Shetty dive into the messy reality of heartbreak. They highlight that healing is personal and often non-linear, emphasizing the importance of self-compassion. The duo discusses how painful experiences can unknowingly empower us and reframe heartbreak into personal growth. They challenge the myth of 'right person, wrong time' and suggest that nostalgia is merely longing for an idealized version of an ex. Ultimately, they encourage acceptance of one's reality to pave the way for true healing.
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Heroic Small Steps After Breakup
- Matthew Hussey recounts sitting on a doorstep with a friend, crying and feeling unworthy after a breakup.
- He describes getting out of bed as a heroic act and how that pain eventually unlocked new inner resources.
Unchosen Pain Can Yield Deep Growth
- Pain can grant unique personal 'gears' or strengths that chosen suffering often provides.
- Matthew argues involuntary pain yielded his most valuable growth, comparable to deliberate challenges like writing a book.
Choice Changes How Pain Affects You
- The rat experiment shows chosen effort produces positive markers while forced effort creates stress despite equal workload.
- Choosing to engage with pain changes its psychological outcome from harmful to beneficial.