How to Overcome the Fear of Disappointing Others

Jun 18, 2025

Explore the fear of disappointing others and its impact on personal choices. Discover where this fear originates and the toll it takes on your well-being. Learn to spot people-pleasing tendencies in your thoughts and body. Get practical strategies for setting boundaries, even when it feels daunting. Shift your focus from others' happiness to your own self-care without guilt. Embrace small steps towards a more balanced and fulfilling life.

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INSIGHT

Origin of Fear to Disappoint

Fear of disappointing others is often learned from childhood experiences of conditional love or safety.
People-pleasing stems from associating self-worth with usefulness to others and maintaining their happiness.

ANECDOTE

Pedro's People-Pleasing Story

Pedro always helped others but was secretly driven by fear of rejection and being seen as unhelpful.
His people-pleasing led to exhaustion, resentment, and burnout despite outward appearances.

INSIGHT

Fawn Response Explained

People-pleasing can be a nervous system survival response known as the fawn response.
This response helps maintain safety in emotionally unsafe or unpredictable environments by appeasing others.

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Do you feel guilty setting boundaries? Worry about upsetting others when you say no? If the fear of disappointing people is driving your decisions, even at the expense of your own well-being, this episode is for you. You’ll learn where this fear comes from, why it’s so hard to let go of, and how you can start shifting out of people-pleasing so you can take care of yourself without guilt.

In this episode, you will learn:

The deeper reason you feel responsible for others’ happiness
How to spot people-pleasing in your body and thoughts
Small ways to start setting boundaries, even when it feels scary

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Calmly Coping is a self-improvement podcast for high achievers who struggle with high-functioning anxiety to help you feel more calm, balanced, and confident from within.

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Intro/Outro Music: Rescue Me (Instrumental) by Aussens@iter (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/tobias_weber/57990 Ft: Copperhead

Disclaimer

All content here is for informational purposes only. This content does not replace the professional judgment of your own mental health provider. Please consult a licensed mental health professional for all individual questions and issues.

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