The Dr. Psych Mom Show
with clinical psychologist
Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten When You're Trapped In The "Victim-Perpetrator" View Of Your Previous Relationship, You Can't Move On
Oct 4, 2024
Recovering from a tough breakup can be incredibly challenging. The emotional journey involves grappling with grief and reflecting on past feelings. Exploring the victim-perpetrator dynamic sheds light on how blame can hinder healing. It emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and understanding one’s role in relationship patterns. By confronting these issues, individuals can foster personal growth and ultimately move forward in a healthier way.
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Two Paths After Breakup
- Picking a partner and staying with them offers two paths: blaming them or owning your contribution.
- Blaming hinders growth, affects children negatively, and is dishonest; owning your part promotes growth.
Victim Identity
- People often enter therapy blaming their ex, framing themselves as victims.
- This "victim" identity prevents growth and healing.
Self-Reflection
- Examine why you were fighting with your partner, and your role in those conflicts.
- Consider your upbringing and expectations for relationships.