This episode of the podcast explores Nicole's struggles as an adult child navigating her parents' divorce after almost 40 years of marriage. They discuss the challenges faced by adult children in divorces, the dynamics of family mediation, the impact on their own well-being, communication dynamics in marriage, and the emotional burden of divorce. Nicole reflects on prioritizing her own needs and navigating tension in redefining family dynamics.
Nicole realizes the need to focus on her own feelings rather than trying to mediate her parents' divorce.
Nicole seeks validation and support from her husband and plans to have open conversations with her sister about their shared experiences.
Nicole anticipates personal growth and a stronger connection with her own emotions after resigning as the family therapist.
Deep dives
Resigning as the Family Therapist
Nicole decides to resign as the family therapist and have open conversations about feelings with her sister. She talks to her husband and asks for his support in times of emotional distress. She also has a tough conversation with her mom about the need for a different kind of relationship and support. Her dad is understanding and assures her of his support.
Discovering Personal Feelings
Nicole realizes the need to focus on her own feelings rather than trying to mediate her parents' divorce. She acknowledges feelings of anger, sadness, and loss about the changes happening in her family. She seeks validation and support from her husband and plans to have open conversations with her sister about their shared experiences.
Challenges and Tensions
While Nicole's sister is supportive, her mom reacts with annoyance to the resignation as the family therapist. Nicole experiences tension and struggles to find new topics to discuss with her mom now that therapy conversations are off-limits. However, her dad is supportive and understanding of her decision, offering his help and presence when needed.
Learning New Dynamics
Nicole prepares for the learning curve of new dynamics with her family members. The transition may be challenging, but she remains committed to redefining relationships and focusing on her own feelings. She hopes that over time, her family members will adjust and understand her need for a different kind of relationship.
Embracing Personal Growth
With her resignation as the family therapist, Nicole looks forward to exploring new passions and finding fulfillment outside of her previous role. She anticipates personal growth and a stronger connection with her own emotions.
Hey, Fellow Travelers. This week we’re in session with Nicole, whose parents are getting divorced after nearly 40 years of marriage and is surprised to find that she has a lot of feelings about this, despite being an adult with a husband and kids of her own. We help her to see that her role as the unofficial family mediator is holding her back--and has been for many years.
If you have a dilemma you’d like to discuss with us—big or small—email us at LoriAndGuy@iHeartMedia.com.
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