The Kink Consultant Intimacy Isn't A Feeling, It's A Skill: An Interview With The Somatica Founders
Jan 23, 2026
In this engaging discussion, Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman, founders of the transformative Somatica Method, dive into the dynamics of intimacy. They explore how intimacy can be a learned skill rather than a daunting emotion. The duo highlights the importance of reducing shame and normalizing fantasies to foster deeper connections. They also share insights on the innovative Virgin Island project, which aims to educate young adults about intimacy through real experiences. If you’ve ever felt stuck in your relationships, this conversation is a must-listen!
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Intimacy As A Trainable Skill
- Somatica is a method that trains people to practice intimacy in real time using mutual vulnerability and deep interpersonal attunement.
- This approach treats coaching as a relational, practice-based skill rather than one-way advice.
Show Up Human In Sessions
- When you enter a Somatica session, bring your full humanity and expect a relaxed, candid coach who shares feelings in the room.
- Practice speaking about how you feel erotically and emotionally to build attunement and safety.
Pleasure As A Healing Path
- Somatica pairs trauma-informed work with deliberate pleasure-focused experiences to retrain the brain toward joy.
- Feeling both the lows and the highs is necessary; pleasure becomes a healing pathway, not an avoidance.