544: Jeremy Herider: Becoming Your Optimal Self

In this episode, Optimal Self Coach, Jeremy Herider, talks about how he discovered, and strives toward, the Optimal Self.

Today, Jeremy talks about "the Art of Becoming the Best Version of You", why it's important to you but more important to those who look up to you, and why we should prioritise #GenerationalHabits over #GenerationalWealth.

Hear about the moment he started re-evaluating his identity, his three most important values, and his advice to his younger self, all on today's episode of The Healthy, Wealthy & Smart Podcast.

Key Takeaways

• "If I'm going to have success in any endeavour, it's going to come from what happens when no one's watching."
• "Don't get your identity caught up in things that are out of your control."
• "Integrity is do what you say you're going to do. Character is 'be who say you are.'"
• "You can be what you want to be but, at the same time, not at the expense of someone else."
• "If you're lacking motivation today, normally it's not lacking motivation, it's lacking clarity. When you get clear on something, motivation jumps out of you."
• "You either give that thing 100% of you, or dont, because 99% wont work."
• "You're leaving something behind whether you like it or not."
• "Stay the course. It's going to take work. Don't be afraid of the work."

More about Jeremy Herider

Meet Jeremy Herider, life coach, business consultant, professional athlete, podcaster… the list goes on. How can one person even have so many titles? That's just what you get when you're living as your Optimal Self. As a pioneer in two professional sports, Jeremy has spent a lifetime building the elite habits necessary to thrive not only in pro sports, but in every other venture that he's been a part of.

Originally from Lancaster, California, Jeremy found his strength as an athlete from an early age. He was a three-sport letterman in high school and an MVP in baseball. He graduated from Gonzaga University where he was an All-Pac10 Infielder. His pro baseball career took off not long after.

But his drive didn't stop there and neither did his list of accomplishments.

Jeremy was the first contracted player with the Diamondbacks to get a hit in the history of the organization. He was later drafted by the LA Reign, officially making him a two-sport professional athlete. More recently, Jeremy has been named a CrossFit Champion, taking home 1st Place for the Deadlift/Box Jump event. Of course, now Jeremy has shifted his focus once again as a productivity consultant for Fortune 500 companies, private business coach, and motivational speaker.

Jeremy's Optimal Self Coaching program and podcast boil down this lifetime of achievement into tangible, attainable habits that anyone can adopt for success. No success story, including Jeremy's, happens by accident. Begin yours with Optimal Self.

Suggested Keywords

Motivation, Identity, Improvement, Habits, Wealth, Health, Smart, Success, Achievement, Integrity, Character, Generational Habits, Priorities, Clarity, Empathy, Empowerment, Choices,

To learn more, follow Jeremy at:

Website: https://www.optimalself.today

Facebook: @OptimalSelf1

Instagram: @optimal_self

YouTube: Optimal Self

TikTok: @optimalself

Optimal Self: Optimal Self linktree

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Read the Full Transcript:

Speaker 1 (00:01):

Hey, Jeremy, welcome to the podcast. So happy to have you on today. Well,

Speaker 2 (00:05):

Thank you. It's so happy to be here. I know

Speaker 1 (00:08):

A fellow podcast host, we'll get into your podcast later on in the, in the episode, but I always love to have a fellow podcast host on for a number of reasons. Number one, being good sound.

Speaker 2 (00:21):

That's so important. That's so true.

Speaker 1 (00:24):

So important. All right. Now, before we get into the meat of the interview, what I'd love for you to share with the listeners is how your background of being a professional athlete baseball, CrossFit I can Zaga, right? Almost they almost did it. Oh my gosh. Are you just dying?

Speaker 2 (00:53):

Was except for that game, we didn't really almost get it. We really got crushed by Baylor. So hats off to Baylor. They, they, they did not miss a beat and they crushed us about halftime. I was, I was already turning the channel a little

Speaker 1 (01:06):

Defeated, but close. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Okay. So enough NCAA talk. So let's talk about how your life as a professional athlete kind of shaped your views on your life now and kind of what you're doing now.

Speaker 2 (01:25):

But I love that question cause it can, it's, it's so many different things in, in regards to, you know, you see what most people see is the end result, right? Is, is you running on a field? In my case, it was baseball. They, they see the end result. They see you on a field with the stadiums packed and the lights are on, you know, and, and, and it's, it's incredible, right? Cause we all watch it. If those of you that are out there that are, that are sports fans, you know, it's just, but we get to see the end result. What we don't see is the work and we don't see the behind the scenes. We don't see it. So as far as is shaping me today is it's still the same way. What I mean by that is this, is that what I, what I loved about athletics was truly not the game.

Speaker 2 (02:14):

Although the game is the icing on the cake. I enjoyed practice. I, I love getting up and going to practice. My mom tells a story, you know, cause you know, with my girls, I have two girls in, you know, mine were like, they didn't want to go to practice. They were like dad, really again. And my mom tells the story that she's like, no, you'd get done with school and you'd walk in the door and already being your uniform ready to go. And you're like, no, I know you got like two hours and I'm like, no, no, no, let's, let's go now just drop me off. She said, you know, she'd be pulling up and I'd be, the door would be open before the car was even stopped and I'm running. So it's, that's kind of the thing that's been ingrained in me since a kid.

Speaker 2 (02:57):

And, and so I enjoy that work and, and moving into your adult life. And when that, you know, when that side of my life ended moving into other aspects, which now I'm in a real estate and in starting optimal self and doing what we do now, you know, I just love the work it's so it's, it shaped me the same way. Is that what I know to be true? Is that the true success that actually people see? Cause a lot of times, you know, people see that success and I, let me be clear. I didn't, I didn't reach my goal. My goal was to be a 20 year major leaguer and a hall of Famer. And you know what I mean? And, and be, you know, Canton, Ohio and be putting on that hall of fame jacket and giving a speech and B I was nowhere near that.

Speaker 2 (03:43):

I didn't get close to that. You know? So my w but when most people see the accolades and they go, oh, wow, you've done this. They, they think of success, right? So again, that is kind of the outsider looking in, but what they, what they never see is, is the work that's put in and that's what you have to love. And, and that happens today is whatever people think is fine. They what they see and what we see of others, that little tip of the iceberg, that's, it's poking out, right? You always see these memes and these things on the internet. It's, what's underneath that water. Well, what I learned is if I'm going to be successful or have success in any endeavor in my adult life, it's going to come from what happens when no one's watching it. What happens when they're not looking with those, those sessions in those days, in those moments. And so that's, that's probably what I learned the most. And it's, it's what I've brought into my adult life from, you know, into these other businesses, from being an athlete.

Speaker 1 (04:44):

Yeah. And that makes perfect sense. And, you know, I liked practicing too. I like the games. I like the practice. I like the teammates, the camaraderie, that feeling of being on a team is always so great. And that teaches you a lot as well. Just being part of a team and being responsible to someone else for someone else and, and being held accountable as well. Yeah, definitely.

Speaker 2 (05:07):

I, yeah, you're, you're spot on. Which is interesting because going from, you know, being a baseball player again with 25 guys on the team, nine guys on the field at a time, right. Is, is you are, you're, you're a hundred percent responsible for, for everybody around you. And, but here's what I'll say. And it kind of goes into optimal self as well. Cause it's the optimal self is the art of becoming the best version of you is that one of the things that I think I failed at in those days was not is, is focusing on, on wanting to be the best at my position or in that league or whatever. And what I should have been doing, what I've learned over time is just truly be the best version of me. Like that guy is still, could be the best, but, but if I'm just stopping and always, then I lose sight of just truly who I am and what I can do.

Speaker 2 (06:03):

And so, and what you're saying is, is very true because going from baseball to where I was accountable to all those guys and coaches and, and, and, and the team, and then when I got into CrossFit and you're all by yourself, you're all by your lonesome, in that a lot of lonely nights at the gym, lonely mornings at the gym training, because nobody has that same goal, right. To, to be a champion or to want those things that a lot of guys would come to the gym and train with me, but I would have to literally put a different guy in at each time, like, oh, we're running, I'll get the good guy, the guy that likes to run, oh, we're lifting the B find the guy that likes to lift. Oh, we're, you know, and so you put, you, you put in all the different people. Cause there was nobody that was just going to be like, yeah, Jeremy, I can't wait to get up at 6:00 AM with, you know, Jeremy, I can't wait to be there until nine o'clock at night with you. So again, I, I, I love what you're saying. Cause that's true. And the truth of life is you do have to have some accountability and the team would definitely show that. So yeah.

Speaker 1 (07:03):

You're spot on. Yeah. And now you mentioned sort of the art of becoming the best version of you. So mentioned it a little bit. Nice segue into why is that important to you?

Speaker 2 (07:16):

So it goes back to that same timeframe is when, when baseball ended and for most people in, in an athletic endeavor, it doesn't end on your terms. Very often, there are very few people that, that get that right. They get to

Speaker 1 (07:32):

Be Derek Jeter,

Speaker 2 (07:36):

Jeter, Tom Brady's like very viewed people are, are those, those people, right? That get to win the world championships, get to be the MVPs and then get to say CNR when they, when they choose. So, you know, most are on, on, on my side where they, they tell you to you're you come to the stadium and the uniform is not in the locker room anymore. We're not renewing your contract. And thanks for your service. It's no. So, but I mean, that app is everybody. It's, it's nothing, but what I learned and I went through a time and I'll be honest. I didn't know it was this right. Is that I was in a form of depression if you will. Is that because I didn't have an identity, my identity was attached to a hundred percent to baseball. Like I was a baseball player and I knew I was in trouble.

Speaker 2 (08:28):

It wasn't that the game was over. I was okay with that. Honestly, like I knew that there was more things I had, you know, two little, little girls in those days, they were tiny, right? Like dad got to be around and we got to go to the park and I got to, I get to do stuff that I, that I hadn't been able to do really. So that was wonderful. But what I was, what I failed to, to start to understand was how my identity, how I had attached myself to being a baseball player. And I was in the store one day and I ran into a gentleman that, that knew me. And he was like, yeah, Hey Jeremy. And all his Isley comes over and he's like, how are you? And I say, great, man, how are you? One of those guys that you see their face, you know, but you don't remember their name.

Speaker 2 (09:09):

Right. And he's like, can you stay here for a second? I want my son. So he calls over. Then here comes his little dude rolling up seven or eight years old. And he goes, Hey, you know, Mason, this is Jeremy, this is the baseball player I was telling you about. And I hadn't played baseball in a few years. Like I hadn't got a paycheck or been on a baseball field in a few years. And it crushed me inside. It was that moment that I realized like, oh shoot, something's wrong. And so I talked to him and we talked baseball and you know, gave him some pointers and you know, you can do this kind of thing. Right. I was the little guy and, you know, we, he was like, he's so small. And I was like, you know, so it was, I, I didn't grow till after.

Speaker 2 (09:53):

Yeah. And we talked a few stories, but when I left there that day, I knew, I was like, okay, I got it. I gotta get this together. Because that, that it shouldn't feel that way. Right. And I knew at that moment that, because he called me a baseball player and I knew I was not a baseball player anymore. Right. Or in the side of being a physical, getting on the field, practicing, playing, getting a paycheck from the Mino, a major league organization. So that's when I knew, I was like, okay, we got it. We got to work on some stuff. We gotta figure some stuff out. Cause th and again, now it becomes getting away from putting my identity to anything more than just being me. And who is that guy? How does he show up in the world? How does, what is the, what are those fulfilling things that happened that I can do on a daily basis that beat me up.

Speaker 2 (10:45):

They, they get me excited. So that, and again, when somebody says, Hey, you're not a baseball player. Cause I almost stopped them. Like I almost had to say, Hey, no, I'm not what to mean. It was just like, oh my goodness. And here's this little boy, you know, and you know, try to keep it together on the outside because on the inside I was just dying. But I hope people, what I hope people get out of that is understanding that don't get your identity caught up in things that are out of your control. It was out of my control of being a baseball player. Somebody had to give me a chance. Somebody had to say, yeah, this is this guy's good enough. Here's a contract. We'll take a chance on you. Somebody has to say, Hey, here's a scholarship. We'd love for you to come to play at our university. It's it's, it's not totally in your hands. The practice, the work, the time, the energy, the effort, the desire. Yeah. That's stuff that I can control. That's the stuff I got to work on, but not tying my identity to the actual act. Right. It's what I do. It's not who I am. And that was a big turning point for me.

Speaker 1 (11:48):

And what advice do you have for someone who maybe is at this crossroads of, you know, maybe they lost their job. Maybe they are came out of a relationship, a long-term relationship where that was part of their identity. So what advice do you have for someone or maybe an exercise or something that you did that helped you pivot that at that moment? Love

Speaker 2 (12:13):

It. That's such a great question. Perfect. So, you know, there's a lot of different ways to look at this and what I, what I go back to is, is the clarity piece in the sense that, who am I? And so then it becomes, start answering that question of what do I stand for? What's important to me. Right? And you know, there's so many different catch words and I'm just going to give you mine for people. So when I sat down and said, okay, what, what matters? Well, what matters the most to me is, is integrity. And so that is a pillar of my life. One is integrity. And what integrity means to me is simple. It's do what you say you're going to do. If you're going to meet me here at five 30 Pacific standard time, then I'm going to be there and I'm going to be ready and I'm going to be prepared.

Speaker 2 (13:01):

So, so integrity, just, just living that way. And then the second thing is, is character. And a lot of people associate those two things together, but here's the difference, integrity being, do what you say you're going to do. Well, character is be who you say you are. If you're a dad, then be the dad, right? If you're that, that worker. And I think that character shows up in many ways, especially for people. Like what you're saying right now is, you know, if you, if you had that breakup and it's going tough because, oh my gosh, now who am I without that partner? Or a job or whatever is understanding first, we got to dig inside ourselves. And so, okay. Who, who do you want to be? How do you want to show up in the world? Well, for me, character means be who you say, you're going to be, if you say, you're going to be that, then you be that every step of the way, and that type of clarity will, will, will actually help you make all the decisions in your life.

Speaker 2 (13:55):

And so, and the third one is empathy for me. So I'll just give you my three integrity, character and empathy. And so I've built it around their empathy. Again, to me was I grew up with women. My mom was a single mom, right? Since she only had sisters, right. Nana and Papa pop was there too. But, but my, my grandparents but, but it was a lot of Nana, right? I was, I was, I was the first born. My mom was 16 when I was born. And so that was not something, you know, no, I don't think there's any 16 year olds in the world that are truly ready to be a parent, right. Or a mother at that at that matter. And so would that being said, right? Like I've been around women that I hear, I get these. And I get blessed with two little girls.

Speaker 2 (14:36):

And my job for them was to empower them, to know that they can be and do anything they want in this world that, that the gender was not. And so I say this in this regard is that empathy means I need to put myself there. I need to listen to them. I don't have to agree. Right. Even if it was, you know, you can go down, whatever. I don't have to agree with you. We don't have to believe the same things, but it means a lot. If I can, if I can listen in and at least try to understand your point or your view on something, it doesn't mean I have to agree, but it does make it a lot easier. And if that, if that's reciprocal, man, how powerful that can be. So I've always wanted those girls to, to understand that. And to know that yes, you can be what you want to be, but at the same time, not at the expense of someone else, you don't have to put somebody else down for you to be for you to be great.

Speaker 2 (15:26):

You don't, you can just be great. It's okay. You can be unapologetically. Great. And, and the thing is, is, I mean, as we grow, so to go back to kind of summarize. So in what you asked was how could somebody would just start with yourself, start with who you are. What, what are those words that you have? And I mean, there's so many different things out there. I mean, I'd love to, free to use ours. We have, when you could sign in and get in, put your email address, we send it to you for free. It's an identity creator. It has steps in it and all that kind of stuff. But even so again, it's free, but if you don't want ours, you can, I can Google. There's so many great things out there that can help people. You know, I'm not, I'm not the one to say, this is the only way there's not, there's so many different ways, but I know this.

Speaker 2 (16:16):

If you're lacking motivation today, it's not, normally it's not lacking motivation, lacking clarity, because when you get clear on something, motivation, jumps off out of you, it will jump out of your skin. Right. And most people can identify with that when they go, oh yeah. When I knew right where I wanted to, where I was going, man, did I take them steps to get there? Right. So, so I think taking it back in that sense for me was all right, who am I? You're not a baseball player anymore. Who are you? What do you want to stand for? How do you want to show up in the world? And let's go be that guy. And again, it also allows you to make incredible choices because the moment you have that clarity, it's like, wait, does, is, is this who I am? Nope. Okay. That doesn't go in my mouth.

Speaker 2 (17:07):

Okay. That's not what I do. Okay. That's not what I, I choose to. You know what I mean? Like you can literally go from every single piece of how you move, what you eat, the people you hang around, you can start to see. And what's really crazy. Karen is this is that you start to implement those things in your life. You start to be it not no other way. Not words on a page, not just talking about it. Yeah. You actually start living it. You start to see the people around, you change all of a sudden other, your, your whole, your identity starts to attract that when you're being that. And it's an amazing with, without even, without even purposely doing it, because what you radiate, what people hear, what people see when, when they say, because again, I'll go back to my life. Like those guys that I was hanging out with, even at the end, right?

Speaker 2 (17:58):

Like it was nothing to go to Monday night football and have, you know, eight or 10 beers on a Monday night and drink a bunch and eat a bunch of wings. It sounds fun. And it's great. But I can tell you this, the moment that, that I, that switch started to happen for me. And I started to pay attention to it. Those weren't the choices that I made anymore because they weren't serving the life that I wanted to live and where I wanted to go. And, and it, and again, it makes things a lot easier for yourself. Cause it's, I call it a hundred or nothing. You either give that thing 100% of you, or don't because 99% won't work because there's always that 1% time that somebody something's going to crack when you leave a crack open, that crack will get used and it will get destroyed and it will be, and it will get bigger. So the more you can give to exactly what you say you are going to give, when you give that a hundred man hundreds easier than 98 or 99, because 98, 99, you haven't really made a full decision yet. And you know, this decision is the, is the key to all of it. Cause the moment you do make that decision, man, how the, how the universe will conspire with you to make it happen.

Speaker 1 (19:08):

Yeah, absolutely. So it sounds like I'm just going to recap quickly that when you're at that sort of crossroads of, of your identity, of, of who you are as a person, you really want to try and get clear on your values, write it down, write down the value, why it's important to you and really like dig deep, you know, it's might be uncomfortable. It might

Speaker 2 (19:34):

Be uncomfortable making that. You're, you're

Speaker 1 (19:37):

Really asking yourself the tough questions. And if you don't like doing this on your own, like you said, there are tools out there. You have a tool, there are tools out there, ask your friends, ask your family. If you have good relationships with said people if not, you can hire someone and they'll help you. But really getting deep and asking those questions. It's the same thing that you would do if you're an entrepreneur and you're trying to figure out your vision of your business, you know, you just want to figure out that vision of yourself as well, and it'll probably help your business. That's a whole, that's a whole other conversation. We'll be here for hours. Now I love when you were kind of talking about what people can do when they're at that crossroads, and you talked about your mom and your grandparents and your children and, and you know, we're talking about generations of a family, right? And so a question I have for you is why generational habits should be taught versus generational wealth. And if you can even explain what you mean by generational wealth, do you mean wealth of money, knowledge, X, et cetera, et cetera. So I'll hand it over to you.

Speaker 2 (20:56):

Yeah. So that's, again, what we see in, in, in at least in our country for sure is, you know, we, you know, that there are families that have, you know, through industrial age, in, in, in all the different times that have handed down, then let's talk w in this case, we're talking money, right. Wealth, right? Whether it be real estate, whether it be, you know, the buildings and things like that, whether it be business, the railroads or the steel or, or whatever that is. And what's, what's, what's incredible is that the majority over time gets, it ends up failing by the third, by the second generation or the third generation. And the reason we say that is the person who built it. They might be handing over the wealth side of things, but they haven't handed over the habits that it took for them to get there.

Speaker 2 (21:50):

And so when you start to get second and third generation away from the actual being that that created it, it starts to dissipate. And so they don't have those same habits, that work habit, that work ethic, that, that mindset that they, that this was built under. So when we talk at optimal self, when we talk about it, we talk about leaving that generation. We start talking about generational habits. And the reason we say that is this is that you're leaving something behind whether you like it or not. You're leaving a legacy, whatever the term is you want to use, you're leaving that now, right now, somewhere, somehow you, because you have interaction with people, whether you have children or not children, you have interaction with people. You're, you're either at a job. Your, you know, if you're in school, right, they're going to know you, somebody, some they're going to be able to describe you and what are they going to describe?

Speaker 2 (22:45):

What are you leaving behind? So what, what we talk about is, and this goes back to what we started this with, is that the only way I can help and I, and I use my family, I use because that's the direct connect, right? My girls, the only way I can help them is by me being a better me. Because again, how many of you out there right now are telling your kids to go make their bed? And they walk by your room and your bed's not made, what are we really telling them? Right? What are we really teaching them? And so when I talk about generational habits, I'm talking about, listen, be the person, right? You've, you've heard Gandhi. You've heard it for years of, of all kinds of Nelson, Amanda, about we have to be the change. Well, well, truly, all you have to do is you can be the best version of you and you will inspire others to do the same.

Speaker 2 (23:35):

What are the habits that you want those children or the people around you to have? What do you want them to learn from you? And if you, if we can at least frame it up that way, then the chances of us living to our own standard are much better. Because sometimes that's what it takes. You know? I mean, our world today is built around social media. Let's be clear, right? It is whatever your view is on it. I don't want to go into my own view because it's really doesn't matter. But there is a bit of it that is corrupting all of us in, in ways myself included. And that's what kind of spins us away from it. So let's get back to saying if, if, because you, we do, I like to tell people I don't care what you think, but I do. Of course I do.

Speaker 2 (24:20):

Like, and I don't mean that I'm going to do something different because of it. If you don't, if I, if I'm living to the best version and you don't like that, then let's have a conversation. Cause, cause I, I, for sure don't want it to hurt somebody, right? That that's, that's not the case, but with generational habits, if we can leave, if we can start to create and be the difference in our own households, that's how we start to create better environments at all times. So we put our kids in better environments. We choose better environments because those environments are, are more conducive to what our habits are. So yeah, we talk about generational wealth as well, because there's nothing greater than that. I mean, if, if my girls can have more than I had, how incredible would that be? That's that's and their kids' kids, right?

Speaker 2 (25:09):

Like, let's talk, let's, let's make it. But at the same time, what I have to be able to help them and what they need to be able to see from me. Not just words on the page or words out of my mouth, but what they need to be able to see from me is how I live. How do I personally get up every day? What is important? What, you know, my hydration, how we eat, the things that we do, the things that we consume, right? Consumption what, not just what we eat, but what we hear, what we watch, what we say, because those words are very powerful. Every word that we, we say, we say to ourselves, you're your cells are eavesdropping that they're paying attention. That subconscious is paying deep attention to that. So again, generational habits or what are you leaving behind? What habits in art.

Speaker 2 (26:01):

And again, because you asked that question and you're like, oh man, as I've done it for myself, I'm like, oh my God, I do do not want my kids. When the kids are a little, this is this is some of you out there that our parents can remember the time that you said something, maybe to you, your wife or your husband or whatever, and your kid repeats it. And you're like, oh, you don't even realize it. Right. We're like, oh my goodness. So again, thinking along those lines, just even if you don't have kids, is what are the words that I'm saying, how am I being and can I help? So can I show people better habits that can, that can inspire them to do the same?

Speaker 1 (26:43):

I love it. That makes so much sense. And, and we'll hopefully be able to instill confidence and allow those next generations to keep building on whatever it is. You're leaving from a wealth, even from a wealth standpoint, from a health standpoint. It's, it's just a great, great way to look at that. Handing down of one generation to the next. I love it. I love it. Okay. So before we start to wrap things up here, where can people find you? How can they get in touch with you? Great.

Speaker 2 (27:19):

So we are on all the social media platforms, Instagram, Facebook optimal self Facebook is optimal. Self one. Igg is optimal underscore self as well. But our, our webpage is optimal self.today, optimal self.today. And on there our, we do have some courses everything up there that we're even showing, right, right now is, is free. So we can, you can jump in we'll, we'll get you in. We have a private Facebook group that we, we put a ton of stuff in that you can actually, you know, it's getting, it's getting pretty good. There's a lot of really cool people in there doing some really cool things. Because again, it's not about us. It's not about me. It's about building a community of like-minded people that want to pull for each other root for each other. You know what I mean? Like environment matters. And so we're trying to build an environment that, that, that people are, are, are trusting of. But they're also contributing back to, because man, to see some of the things that these people are doing just using some of the principles of optimal self is pretty amazing. So we'd love to have everybody. So if you're interested, please optimal self that today. We'll get you there.

Speaker 1 (28:30):

Awesome. Thank you so much. And who can want a little more encouragement and support in their life. And now before we end last question that I ask everyone is knowing where you are now in your life and in your career. What advice would you give to your younger self?

Speaker 2 (28:48):

Man, so much. No, I think that I, I think for myself is the thing that when you, when you ask that the, the, the very first words that came to my head is stay the course and what that means, what I mean by that is a lot of times we, we believe something. We want something we're afraid to talk about it. And I will say this as an athlete. You know, when I was very little, yes, my, the, you asked me what I was doing. And I was like, I'm going to be a baseball player. Like, that's what I was doing, you know? And I wasn't the best. Let's just be very clear. I wasn't your all-star game guy. I wasn't the kid hitting home runs as a kid who was getting tired. I was opposite. I didn't make all star teams. I didn't have all that stuff.

Speaker 2 (29:40):

And so, you know, it was, it was a turning point. I'll share this really quick because I think it'll help people out. There is I was 13 years old and my best friend's dad was our coach. My best friend was the best player, if not in the league, definitely on our team. And we grew up together. He's still one of my best friends to this day. And he was, it was a bigger kid growing up. You probably, you guys probably remember this. I was not that kid. I was the little munchkin kid, you know, you just hit over at second base or, you know so, and at 13 we won the championship in our league and it was probably the best year I ever had as a, as, as a baseball player at that young age, I thought for sure, man, this is the year I'm going to make the all-star team, right.

Speaker 2 (30:23):

This is the year and I didn't make it. And our team had won. So we had this, you know, the, the, the, the pizza party after. And, and so I went up to coach who was also, you know, I'd been on vacation with him because I was, you know, got to, you know, he's, his son was my best friend. And I said, you know, he's like, what's the matter? What do you want? And I said how come I didn't make the all-star team? And he looked me dead in the face. Can I can tell you this? I, I can tell you to this day, which is not even know how many 40, 30 years later he, and I said, and he, I could tell you what he was wearing. I could tell you what he smelled. Like, I could tell you everything about it.

Speaker 2 (31:02):

Every I could tell you what I was wearing. And he said, because you weren't good enough now don't get me wrong. The crushes, any 13 year old boy or girl, probably. But that 13 year old boy in me was crushed. He was, he still is to this day, but I'll tell you this. And I went to the side, you know, and got away from where everybody was. I went up to the lady, the pizza counter, and I asked her if I could use the phone, if she'd call my mom, because her mom wasn't there, she could dial the number for me. I asked her to come get me. She's like, what are you doing? I said, mom, please come get me, please come get me, please, please, please, please swish. She's like, find them on my lap. I didn't even wait. I just went out and sat on the curb, waited for her.

Speaker 2 (31:39):

She pulled up and she's like, what is going on? And as soon as I got in the car, man, tears just pouring out and she's like, what is going on? I'm like, just go, please. She's like, I'm not leaving, moving this car until you tell me what's going on. So I told her, right. I said, I wasn't good enough. And she was like, ready? Any mom? Right? Like, and here's the thing. She, you know, I said, please, don't go in there. I mean, bears don't please, please, please. Well, what do you want? What do you want Jeremy? And I said, can we go to big five? I don't even know big five as a place anymore, but in California was at sporting goods store. And I said, please take me there. And she said, what do you want? And I walked in, I showed her.

Speaker 2 (32:18):

I said, can we please buy me a tea? I'll never forget. It was their big yellow sign, $19 and 99 cents. And that tea is still with me today. That was my 13 year old year. And that tea, I went in the backyard and I hit minimum a hundred balls off that tee every single day. No one's watching. I didn't have many balls to start and I'd tear them up. I started using tennis balls or racquetballs and anything I could find to hit off and a hundred swings. I would not. Everyday when I got home, I'd go out and do a hundred swings or now, or I wouldn't let myself do anything else. Right. All the way through, by the time I was 18 years old, I was, I was in all league player. I was the MVP of our team. I got a scholarship and the rest is kind of history.

Speaker 2 (33:02):

But that, that, that T stays with me as a symbol is because that it wasn't that he was saying, I want people because most people, even when they hear this, they go, what we should have knocked that guy. And what is it? You know, where's he at today? And I'm like, it was the greatest thing that ever happened. And here's why is because he was honest with me. He wasn't saying I wasn't good enough ever. I wasn't good enough in that moment. So again, there was 12, 15 teams in that league. There's, you know, whatever, 15, 16 kids on everything. There's 80 to a hundred kids in that league. It's not like I'm the only kid that didn't make it there. 15 kids and made that all star team. If I was the 16th best kid that year, then I wasn't good enough. Right. But it's not that I'm not good enough forever.

Speaker 2 (33:47):

It depends on how I, how, how you look at it. But I knew this, no one was ever going to say that to me because I, because of lack of effort, you, weren't going to tell me that because I didn't work hard because I'm not, I'm telling you, I'm still not best of that in my, you know, I wasn't the best player of all time now, but I maximized my ability. I will say that like that, that's something that I want people to understand, but I want what I wanted them to see is there's somebody out there right now that has probably been told they're not good enough. They're not, they're not pretty, they're not smart. You're the dumb sister. You're the dumb brother. You're this, whatever, right. It happens to all of us. There's so many people out there that did that lives with us forever.

Speaker 2 (34:26):

And I'm here to tell you it lives with me today, but it lives with me in a way that he told me that, because in that moment I wasn't good enough. And I needed to prepare. I needed to get better. That was in my control. That's the thing that was in my control because I didn't make it at 14. I didn't make it a 15. I didn't make it to say let's be clear. Right. And, and I, and you probably heard this, I think it was a bill gates and say, we underestimate, you know, we, we overestimate what we can do in a year. And we underestimate what we can do in five. And again, and when I look back at those years, I think, oh my gosh, because if I would have expected after that, you know, to go out side and hit a hundred balls and then leave and go make the next all-star team.

Speaker 2 (35:07):

Cause I did it once I would have been, it would be a full, everybody would be like, yeah, you're crazy. Right? It's the same person that goes, oh, I went to the gym once. Like, no, it's not, that's not going to work. Oh, I had us salad. No, that's not going to work. This is about consistency. This is about finding your thing and doing consistency over time will create those results. But, but that story in that, that T is a symbol for me to remember like, Hey, starting a podcast, starting this. You're not good enough. You're not, you have to get better. And that takes the work are you with? And if you're willing to do the work, man, you get to be on cool podcasts like this with Karen. And that's that's, that's what ultimately happens. Right? You get the, you get the plug along and, and cool things happen. So I would just tell myself to understand that, listen, it's going to take work. Don't be afraid of the work. Don't be afraid of putting in the extra hours. Don't be afraid of getting up early. Don't just, just keep going, man, stay the course. Don't be afraid of the work. Cause if you do that, anything's possible.

Speaker 1 (36:18):

Oh, you went on mute. You're on mute. I was saying excellent advice for anyone and certainly great advice for any youngster out there trying to get better at things I want to get better at. So thank you so much for that advice. Thank you. And thank you so much for coming on today and sharing all this good stuff. We will have all the links to all of your stuff at podcast dot healthy, wealthy, smart.com. One click will take you to social media. We'll take you to the website, everything, to all the free stuff you mentioned. So we will have all of that over at the podcast website. So Jeremy, thank you so much for coming on today and giving us up, giving up some of your time.

Speaker 2 (37:07):

Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. I really, really appreciate it. I really enjoyed it. So looking forward to the next time.

Speaker 1 (37:14):

Pleasure, pleasure, and everyone. Thanks so much for listening. Have a great couple of days and stay healthy, wealthy and smart.