How to Set Boundaries That Actually Work With Teens: Vintage. 151

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Featuring Mindfulness expert, Susie Asli

Having kids can seem like a non-stop obstacle course trying to get another living being to do things, whether for their own good or our own sanity.

Getting the right balance between love and discipline is incredibly tricky, and for many of us it's a constant haggle.

So what do the experts say about it? What works, and what about the teenager who doesn't seem to care?

READ MY BLOG:

• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/blog/whats-going-on-when-our-boundaries-and-consequences-dont-seem-to-work/

TOP TIPS:

1. Focus on Connection and a strong relationship with your teenager. 
2. Let teens experience the direct results of their actions. 
3. Consequences should be clear, time-limited, and directly related to changing the specific behavior.
4. Involve Teenagers in creating consequences.
5. Separate the Behavior from the Person: You love them unconditionally, but don't like the specific behavior.
6. Don't take away activities that support personal development. 
7. Always provide context for rules and consequences.
8. Be Consistent and Fair: Follow through with consequences, but remain flexible and understanding.
9. Notice and acknowledge when they do well to build connection and mutual respect.
10. Seek Support if you're finding it challenging to manage your teenager's behavior.

RESOURCES USED:

• https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/family/effective-vs-counterproductive-methods-of-teen-punishment/?utm_source=AdWords&utm_medium=Search_PPC_m&utm_term=PerformanceMax&utm_content=&network=x&placement=&target=&matchtype=&utm_campaign=16929735023&ad_type=responsive_pmax&adposition=&kwd_id=&gclid=Cj0KCQiAnsqdBhCGARIsAAyjYjQ7VuP6YXy_xN5VEyj-jTeNIwj1LDUhiSEaegaxw4NeK4zBWoI1GVMaArsTEALw_wcB
• Parenting style as a moderator of the effect of temperament on adolescent externalising and internalising behaviour problems: https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/educational-and-developmental-psychologist/article/abs/parenting-style-as-a-moderator-of-the-effect-of-temperament-on-adolescent-externalising-and-internalising-behaviour-problems/78AC30E10887EC321057BF1E1C8CA349

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I don't have medical training so please seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping.

My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
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You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk