088 - I was a Teenage Christian Nationalist with April Ajoy
Sep 29, 2023
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April Ajoy, recovering conservative and viral TikToker, discusses her teenage Christian nationalist experience and deconstruction from fundamentalism. She shares her irreverent videos critiquing Evangelical culture, religious upbringing, fire tunnels, conflicting beliefs, societal expectations, and evolving faith. Also includes discussions on presidents, MTV influence, homosexuality, and her book deal and vibrator promotion.
The speaker's deconstruction of their beliefs was prompted by the death of their father and their brother coming out, challenging their faith in healing, charismatic theology, and views on homosexuality.
The speaker shares their journey of accepting their non-binary spouse's gender identity, emphasizing the importance of challenging societal and conservative expectations in marriage and embracing authenticity and open communication.
Despite facing criticism, the speaker remains a Christian and actively speaks out against corruption within evangelicalism and Christian nationalism, using their understanding of the culture to engage in meaningful conversations and challenge harmful beliefs.
Deep dives
Deconstructing Pentecostalism: A Journey of Faith and Loss
The speaker shares their personal experience of growing up in a Pentecostal church and the subsequent deconstruction of their beliefs. The death of their father challenged their faith in healing and charismatic theology, leading to a questioning of evangelical doctrines. Another pivotal moment occurred when their brother came out as gay, forcing them to reconsider their views on homosexuality. Despite these challenges, they still consider themselves a Christian, with a more spiritual and action-focused faith centered on love and making the world a better place.
Navigating Gender Identity in Marriage
The speaker discusses their journey of acceptance and support as their non-binary spouse came out and began exploring their gender identity. They initially struggled with societal and conservative expectations, but gradually embraced a more authentic and non-traditional approach in their marriage. They learned to challenge gender norms, prioritize open communication, and let go of preconceived notions. Their marriage evolved to reflect their individual preferences and strengths, with both partners finding greater happiness and fulfillment.
Embracing a Different Kind of Christianity
Despite facing challenges and criticism from more conservative Christians, the speaker still considers themselves a Christian. Their faith has shifted from a belief-focused approach to a more action-oriented one. They prioritize living out the teachings of Jesus, focusing on love, compassion, and making a positive impact in the world. While they acknowledge the corruption within evangelicalism and Christian nationalism, they feel called to speak out against it from within the faith, using their understanding of the language and culture to engage in meaningful conversations and challenge harmful beliefs.
Coming Out and Acceptance
The podcast episode explores the experience of coming out and the importance of acceptance within families and communities. The hosts share personal stories of their siblings coming out as gay and non-binary, highlighting the initial challenges and reactions they faced. They emphasize the need for creating a safe and loving environment for LGBTQ+ individuals, expressing their own growth in understanding and supporting their loved ones.
Navigating Evangelicalism and Deconstruction
The podcast episode also delves into the hosts' personal journeys of deconstruction and their experiences within evangelical Christianity. They discuss the conflicts they faced due to their changing beliefs, particularly around topics like politics and religious dogma. The hosts shed light on their decision to make their journeys public through social media, using humor and authenticity to connect with fellow deconstructors and challenge the harmful aspects of their previous beliefs.
We talk with April Ajoy, a well-known viral TikToker, YouTuber and podcaster. She describes herself as a “recovering conservative, humorously detoxing religion.” Raised as a pastor's kid, April was deep in Evangelicalism to the point of working for The 700 Club and singing her original song, America Say Jesus on The Jim Bakker Show. While deconstructing from fundamentalism, she walked away from her Christian nationalist beliefs and began to make irreverent and funny videos lampooning modern Evangelical culture and church life.