75: 10 Ways to Increase Emotional Intelligence

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In this episode, MaryAnn Walker delivers on her promise to share 10 practical ways to boost your emotional intelligence or emotional maturity. Before diving into these tips, she explains why cultivating emotional maturity is crucial, outlining five compelling reasons.

1. Increase Self-Awareness:
   • Gain insight into your emotions and behaviors.
2. Enhance Interpersonal Relationships:
   • Develop empathy for stronger and more fulfilling connections.
3. Effective Conflict Resolution:
   • Better manage emotions for finding workable solutions.
4. Stress Management:
   • Take ownership of your emotions for self-regulation.
5. Improve Work Performance:
   • Enhance leadership, teamwork, and adaptability.

10 Ways to Increase Emotional Maturity:

1. Assume There Is Always More to Learn:
   • Encourage depth and increase empathy and connection through curious questions.
2. Let Others Have Their Experience:
   • Avoid stealing the spotlight; let them share without interruption.
3. Separate Facts from Your Story
   • Examine situations objectively, distinguishing between facts and interpretations. 
4. Consider the Other Person's Experience:
   • Foster empathy by thinking about their perspective.
5. Save Level 10 Reactions for Level 10 Situations:
   • Match your emotional response to the significance of the situation.
6. Take Responsibility for Your Emotions:
   • Identify and fulfill your emotional needs for self-regulation.
7. Take Responsibility for Your Actions:
   • Acknowledge your role in conflicts, even if it's a small part.
8. Be Clear in Your Requests:
   • Clearly express your needs, avoiding emotional manipulation.
9. Find Middle Ground
   • Notice if you are slipping into black and white thinking and find common ground. Allow space for both experiences and perspectives to exist. 
10. Know That Two Experiences Can Exist at the Same Time:

• Increasing your capacity to feel and process multiple emotions at the same time can increase your capacity to hold space for others joy or pain. 

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