Why being a CEO is so lonely (and how to fix that)
Jan 21, 2025
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Allan Barton, a former managing director with extensive experience in waste disposal and engineering consultancy, shares his insights on the isolation that often accompanies leadership. He discusses the challenges of forming genuine work relationships and the conflict between public persona and authenticity. Barton highlights the importance of support systems, akin to sports coaching, for emotional resilience. He also addresses the need for balancing personal well-being with professional responsibilities, emphasizing the evolution of leadership towards collaboration.
CEOs often experience profound loneliness due to the complexities of leadership and changing relationships within their organizations.
Having external support from coaches or peer networks is vital for leaders to manage their mental health and cultivate resilience.
Deep dives
The Loneliness of Leadership
Leadership at the highest levels often comes with significant loneliness. As decision-makers, CEOs bear full responsibility for their organizations, which can create a disconnect with colleagues who may fear them or feel the pressure of performance expectations. People in high positions may find it challenging to trust their peers, as former friends may become subordinates, complicating relationships and decision-making processes. The realization that they are essentially isolated in their roles can be a daunting aspect of climbing the corporate ladder.
Importance of External Support
Having external support, such as a coach or mentor, plays a crucial role in helping leaders navigate their responsibilities and mental health challenges. A coach provides a safe space to express thoughts freely and can facilitate personal development, which is vital for coping with the pressures that come with leadership. This external support not only aids in maintaining peak performance but also helps leaders build resilience against the inevitable downturns they may face. Peer networks can also offer valuable insights and encouragement, fostering a sense of community despite the isolation that often accompanies top leadership roles.
Finding Purpose Beyond Loneliness
Despite the loneliness associated with being a leader, there are rewarding moments that can make the experience worthwhile. Leaders may find fulfillment in witnessing the positive impacts they have on their teams, such as when team members express gratitude for a change in work culture. Creating an ethos of support within an organization can lead to improved morale and increased productivity among employees. Emphasizing personal development and purpose is essential, as these factors contribute significantly to a leader's overall satisfaction and effectiveness in their role.
Running a business is rewarding in plenty of ways – not least in terms of salary. But it can also be extremely lonely. Having friends at work becomes complicated (or even impossible), and you can’t be sure if people like you, or if they’re just saying what they think you want to hear. If you’re the boss, how can you learn to live with those downsides? To find out, Isabel Berwick speaks to Allan Barton (former MD of the waste disposal firm Shanks), and Tiffany Gaskell, co-CEO at the coaching consultancy Performance Consultants International.