See It From an Angle of Appreciation | Timm Chiusano
Sep 28, 2024
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Timm Chiusano, a creator who explores parenting through Stoic philosophy, joins the conversation to share insightful parenting techniques. He emphasizes the importance of viewing children's behaviors with curiosity and appreciation. Timm and Ryan discuss how tailored communication can enhance understanding and relationships. They also highlight the transformative power of appreciation, urging parents to recognize their children's perspectives to foster empathy and positivity within the family.
Effective communication with children hinges on individualized approaches, recognizing that each child may require unique delivery styles to grasp important messages.
Adopting an appreciation mindset in parenting helps to re-frame challenges, allowing parents to celebrate rather than feel frustrated by their children's messy but engaging experiences.
Deep dives
Tailoring Communication for Kids
Effective communication with children requires understanding their individual sensitivities and responses. Different children may react disparately to the same message, necessitating a tailored approach to convey important truths. For example, one child might need a gentle reminder, while another may require a more direct or emphatic delivery to grasp the same concept. This personalized communication can help avoid misunderstandings and emotional distress while ensuring that the intended message is successfully conveyed.
The Distinction Between Gratitude and Appreciation
Gratitude often feels transactional, focusing on recognizing when something beneficial occurs, while appreciation fosters a more profound recognition of aspects of life regardless of circumstances. Appreciation involves understanding the intrinsic value of everyday items and experiences, like a table's aesthetic or its history, enhancing one's worldview. Practicing appreciation allows individuals to unlock deeper layers of meaning in everyday life, instilling a sense of contentment and fostering the potential for gratitude. By adopting this mindset, parents can encourage their children to notice the positive aspects of their environment, even in the midst of chaos.
Viewing Parenting Challenges Through a Positive Lens
Parenting challenges can be re-framed by viewing them with appreciation rather than frustration, recognizing the value of life's messiness. For instance, understanding that a child's messy room signifies engagement and play can change the perspective from irritation to celebration. This approach not only diffuses tension but also fosters connection, as acknowledging children's actions—even when missteps occur—can enhance communication and understanding. By empathizing with a child's unique viewpoint, parents can nurture trust and encourage open dialogues, allowing both parents and children to learn from their experiences.
When they mess up or do things they’re not supposed to do, do as Epictetus says and grab the situation by the other handle. What they did may seem nonsensical to us as parents, but to them it made perfect sense. Timm Chiusano and Ryan talk about looking at these moments with their kids through the lens of curiosity, awareness, and appreciation.