S3 Ep 9: Bullying: What It is, What It isn’t and What To Do
Mar 3, 2023
29:01
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Quick takeaways
Bullying involves a power imbalance, repetitive mistreatment, and intentional harm, and it is essential to differentiate it from normal ups and downs of friendship or occasional mean behavior.
Parents should approach their child's bullying behavior with support and problem-solving in mind, letting go of the notion that it reflects their own parenting skills or the child's future character, and focus on assessing power dynamics, repetition, and harm caused by the behavior.
Deep dives
Identifying Bullying: Power, Repetition, and Harm
Bullying involves a power imbalance, repeated mistreatment directed at a specific victim, and intentional harm. It is important to differentiate bullying from normal ups and downs of friendship or occasional mean behavior. Bullies may exhibit aggression due to various reasons, including seeking attention, struggling with self-regulation, feeling powerless in other settings, or lacking empathy. Understanding that bullying behavior is often a cry for help can help parents provide compassionate support while addressing the issue.
Recognizing When Your Child is the Bully
Parents should let go of the notion that their child's bullying behavior reflects their own parenting skills or the child's future character. Instead, it is crucial to approach the situation with support and problem-solving in mind. By assessing power dynamics, repetition, and harm caused by their child's behavior, parents can determine whether their child is exhibiting bullying. Bullying, although harmful, often indicates internal struggles within the child. Effective intervention involves helping the child develop empathy, seeking evaluation for underlying issues, discussing alternate behaviors, and creating appropriate consequences for their actions.
Supporting the Child Being Bullied
When a child is being bullied, it is important for parents to offer a safe and supportive space. Believing the child, encouraging open communication, and avoiding overreactions or retaliation are crucial steps. Parents should discuss the difference between occasional challenges and bullying with their child and help them understand that being bullied is not their fault. Collaboratively developing strategies to handle the situation, involving trusted adults, finding supportive communities, and engaging in activities that boost the child's confidence can empower the child and help them navigate and overcome the bullying experience.
This week it's just us! Join me for a look into bullying and what behaviors to look for when identifying it, what to do when your child is being bullied, and what to do when you suspect - or know - your child is the bully.
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